styphilis

heartache. what an aweful day. not as much for me, but for my brother.

he was on his way home at about 2:30 last night with his friend, amber. he had just bought a brand new bike so they were taking it for a spin and hitting some bars. they were crossing an overpass and amber got too close to the guard rail. she flipped over it and fell onto the street below. by the time he got down to her, she was bleeding from the mouth. my brother is a tattoo artist at saint sabrina's so he's taken a bunch of first aid classes. he did everything that he could, but basic first aid can't fix a head injury. he stayed with her in the hospital until they pulled the plug at two o'clock this afternoon.

my heart feels like it is in knots.

i spent the rest of the day with him. he was still wearing his bloody jeans. he slept for about half of the time that i was there. some much needed rest. he is physically and emotionally drained. some of you have met my little brother, mike. he puts up a tough front from across the room, but he's one of the most gentle and fragile people i know. i just wish that i could hug him and tell him i love him until it doesn't hurt anymore. but i know that it's going to hurt and haunt him forever.

i've never witnessed anyone's death. and i most certainly have never held anyone close to me as they slipped away. seeing my brother in this state is as close as i've ever been.


update: yesterday would've been amber's birthday. her mom had flown up from virginia when she heard about the accident. she decided that they should go ahead with the birthday party in the style of an irish wake. they celebrated amber's life and her fantastic sense of humor. it also showed her mother that she had a great group of friends looking out for her. it was a good start to the healing process for all of them. my brother is sounding in better spirits today. i think that meeting her mother has helped to settle him a little.