stormworm

morning,

worried as hell. i sent as note to k asking her for my things back and am scared it ill be the last time i see or speak to her. i just wish i didn't have feelings for her, then we could just be friends. but think it would be to hard for me to see her. i don't know, the future holds what the future holds. i do know that, at least on my side, we fit together.

i just wish this time things would have been different.

i know ill probably say that again. and next time i may find another thats even better suited for me. (can you here the death throes of my hope?)

everytime i get fucked over i make apologies for others to myself. i say its my fault, not theres, that i wasn't good enough.

well this time, i can say its not my fault, i did everything and more for this girl, but again, she says she wants a new life.

i wish i could have a new life-
one with smiles and concern, relation and understanding

i wish i could have a happy life, but so far that wish has been toppled down as every turn has been a false start in my race toward some sort of scontentment

next time the gun shoots off i hope its in my face