stingray69

This guy I work with is gonna be on Oprah today! I'm not sure what the topic is, but his wife gets to ask Oprah a "personal" question. They're taping it today, so the actual show won't air until next week. I won't be there in person, but I will definately be there in spirit. Rock on Oprah!

A friend of mine went to an out-of-town seminar through his work. He wound up engaging in pre-marital sex with a lady...who was married. He was not made aware of this fact until post-coitus. The company he works for wants to do business with the company she works for. She wants this affair to continue. His boss actually thinks it's a good idea for him...
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Tool is playing Chicago this weekend and I'm not going to be there.

This is not real. This isn't happening.

It's kind of chilly out and it's about five minutes from raining and I have no one to snuggle with. Woe is me.

For some reason, I cannot stop listening to Sticky Fingers by The Rolling Stones. By far their best album.

On the weekends, I work in a liquor store, where I get to see all kinds of freaks. Last Sunday, Black Bob, this crazy homeless guy with a ZZ Top beard and all sorts of crap hanging from it (it looked like there might have been a bird's nest in there), gave forth some amazing advice that I feel I must share with everyone: "Do...
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I am the smartest, funniest, wittiest member of this site. Everyone loves me because I'm so clever. Hooray for me!

I done did worked me a fifteen hour shift last night.

Don't you be frettin'. I made me all kinds of moneys. Most of those hours were at time and a half. Cha-ching!!!!

I am currently reading Fight Club by Chuck Palahniuk...again. In the book, he mentions that airline slang for Stewardess is A) Space Waitress and/or B) Air Mattress.

I find both terms to be insanely funny. Does anyone know anyone in the airline industry that can confirm this slang?

It's out (officially) today!!!!!!

Happy new Tool!!!!!!

A friend of mine scored a ticket to see Tool on their pre-tour tour. They are playing in really small venues until this fall. This pre-tour is just kind of a warm up. It took an act of God for him to get this ticket, so I'm happy for him. Still, that bastard is seeing Tool next month and I'm not. How can Tool do...
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I have to go to a funeral tomorrow. It's for my friends' son. He was almost 3 years old and drowned in a pool. He was missing for a total of 15 minutes before they found him. Tomorrow is going to suck. Hopefully I will have something non-depressing to post this weekend.