starstealer

my mom is native and loves thanksgiving. my dad is muslim (not practicing) and loves thanksgiving. i wonder what that means. probably nothing. so i have been having strange dreams lately that made me realize something BIG about myself that i can't tell ne1 but basically i figured out the root of all my boy problems. so neway i have to get my cds back...
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i don't know if it's desperation that i feel that i need him now or what. i really just want to be free of those sort of things, ya'know love. i've decided to not have sex anymore or at least until i figure out who i am so i am not using sex to try to figure out myself or as a substitute for love...
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it happened in safeway. it's never happened to me like that before. there they were. buying groceries together. so happy. so in love. with huge smiles on their faces talking like they were the only 2 people in the world. and there i was and i was so frozen in the moment i couldn't spare myself any humilation and they caught me staring. and i...
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i hate ny life. i did meet someone .

Tangled Up In Me
by Skye Sweetnam

Album : Noise From The Basement


You wanna know more, more, more about me
I'm the girl who's kickin' the coke machine
I'm the one that's honkin' at you cause I left late again

Hey, Hey, Hey
Can't you see I want you
By the way I push you away
Yeah, don't judge me tomorrow by the way...
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so this is it. no more.
no more guys that will hurt me because they think i will hurt them.
no more guys that don't show their emotions.
no more liars.
no more fakes.
no more guys that try to change me.
no more guys that make me wait for them.
no more waiting for anyone.
no more mama's boys.
no more pretentious losers.
no...
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I don't feel good. All I can think about is pancakes. Last week it was eggs. And the week before that spaghetti. I ate 10 pancakes just now and I wonder how I got so fat.

I hope Kris calls back because I really want to see how she is. I need to get a hold of Jeaneece too. I should call Sam but I just don't feel good. She is probably keeping the phone lines clear for boy toy neway.

so i finally saw the punisher......sort ot. i fell asleep through most of the movie. Jeaneece has a new crush, Jim. and Sam and her boy toy are fighting. Jim was suppose to come by last night but ended up standing her up. For once I wanted to go to Jerry's and chill, so did Jeaneece but we had to wait for Jim. who didn't...
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I'M SO FAT!
I don't think NE1 will call me tonight to hang out and that sux. trevor called and we talked. i dunno what will happen. it's over but he wants me to go to Korea for two weeks . I really shouldn't of quit my job but this works i guess. i get to see more of my nephews! but i dunno. there's...
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We went to Reno last night. It was cool. We did end up at Jerry's but not until way late. This Thursday we are going clubbin'.

do you ever look at someone and realize over the years they developed a frankenstein personality? like they just stole characteristics from other people? like you?
At the movies these high schoolers really pissed me off. I told them off and that made me even more angry. It was like "Thanx for fucking with my karma bitches!" I hate immature little assholes like that though....
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