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starsnflames

Finland

Member Since 2004

Followers 172 Following 371

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Sunday Feb 04, 2007

Feb 4, 2007
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I NEED TO MOVE FROM HERE!!!!!!!!!!!! i m getting crazy among my narrow minded french fellow citizen!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i find it so hard to live here!!! maybe i should try sweden again, it s high time i moved from here!!!! i might go to finland, as i have a friend there, for a while before i hit sweden again, if i can!!! job s almost over, i have nothing after, o i m kinda back to my non existing life, no job, one friend that i see sometime, and no place on my own (not that i don t like my family, but...)!! none of my other friends ever call me to do something together!! and i ve realised i will never find a job i like here, at least in my region, and sorry for this fellow french members, but i don t want to live in another region if i am to stay in france!!! so i have to leave and build something somewhere else!! shit i feel so lonely and so powerless, it s eating me from inside!! i m trying to fight the feeling of failure, but it s so difficult sometimes!!! i wish i was part of something, i wish i had something that woumd make me happy, it s like my heart s dead!!! weird!!! strange feeling!!! confusing things go through my mind, and sometimes i think i m probably much more depressed than i realise!!!

enough of this!! lets talk about something else, try to forget! focus on good things(even if they are few!)!!

so i m still running a few times during the week to stay at least physically healthy (if not mentally) and so far it s working!! i haven t been skateboarding for a while now and i m starting to feel the need for it!!! easy with the lovely weather we have here instead of the snow!!! i almost forgot that when skateboarding i tend to forget all my problems and to feel so alive!!!!!

on a positive note, i ve met some new friends on sg and hope to share great time with them here, as i m trying with all the people who are already my friendsand who i thank for it!!

as soon as my job s over i will get back to my project, which s going so slow i sometimes wonder if it s really gonna happen, but i m keeping faith in it!! i just need to be less lazy!!! i hate this state of mind when you know you have thoings to do but never feel comfortable doing them, even if you know it s gonna be totally worth it!! know what i m talking about? nevermind!!

anyway, it s not ready yet, but you can have a look at www.tilldeathclothing.com!!! the site s not done yet, but it s something that reminds me not to be too lazy if i want it to happen!!!
well that all for the moment, sorry for the boring blog, maybe i m just tired, i haven t slept properly for a long long time now!!! have fun everyone!!!!! and check my friends band!!!!they re awesome!!!

oh i almost forget my usual pinup!!!

VIEW 20 of 20 COMMENTS
meow:
kiss miao!!
Feb 8, 2007
casper:
oh im ALWAYS having fun, haha thank you.

mwah
Feb 9, 2007

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