starrydynamo

Im falling apart. Im being ripped to shreds and scattered in the deepest pits of hell and misery and insanity that only the god I [dont] believe in could muster. I want an escape. I need sanity and I need it fast before I put a fucking gun to my head and scream ITS NOT FUCKING WORTH IT ANYMORE!! These demons I have coined within my tormented intellect are no longer crying for help, I have escalated my distress to a much more urgent and compelling state of necessary address. The narcotic waste I have been consuming at an alarming rate is no longer sufficient to stifle all of my unnoticed attempts at saying
>>please god just fucking love me.<<
No, this is now more of a scream for help than a cry. I have been screaming and crying and breaking everything within reach, waiting for some one else with some remaining ounce of empathy and compassion to come along and tell me that it will be ok, that somebody finally fucking cared. But still Im left here as Ive always been, stuck in that metaphorical limbo of a rock and a hard place that I now see is cold and hollow and empty.


Fucking ouch.