starrydynamo

Ok so maybe it's because I'm stressed out of my mind or maybe it's because the one year anniversary of the day I killed a small portion of myself is rapidly approaching or maybe it's because I watched TV for the first time in 6 years or maybe it's because this country is just fucked up and everything is going to hell. Whatever it is I have been so frustrated with the world lately and it's to the point where I was watching the news this afternoon and I got so mad and so upset about one of the stories that I actually started screaming and crying and threw the remote across the room. I'm not normally so emotional. Trust me. I never cry.

What really got me aggrivated was that i was babysitting for a family that I don't know very well the other day and I found out that the father was actually in the military and had been sent to Iraq to fight in the war that morning. He left behind a 2 1/2 year old daughter and a 5 year old son who are absoloutly darling and I had the divine pleasure of caring for. When they went to bed the little girl started crying for her mom and dad. I told her that her mom would be home very soon, but then she asked why her daddy wasn't there and I had to deal with trying to explain to her where her dad was.

The story I saw on the news this afternoon was about the war and some lying sack of shit politician was self-righteously spouting about how America is PULLING OUT OF IRAQ AND THE AMOUNT OF SOLDIERS ON IRAQ SOIL HAS DECREASED. How the FUCK are they going to try to say that people are LEAVING when the dad just got shipped off to a fight for a country that couldn't care any fucking less about his two young kids at home WONDERING WHERE THEIR FATHER IS.

I don't care if he is being patriotic I don't care if he believes in fighting to defend his country, I don't care if he is needed, I DON'T CARE. HE HAS TWO YOUNG KIDS THAT DON'T HAVE A FATHER FOR THE TIME BEING. I am not a political person, I LOATHE politics and I will never try to intentionally offend or persuade anyone to bend their views. I typically have a hands off attitude about politics and religion and keep my mouth shut. But this, this is too much. If anyone disagrees or is offended, I'm sorry, that was not my intention. But I am SO PISSED OFF and FED UP with this country and our government and our president and this "WAR" that is COMPLETELY UNJUSTIFIED.

I am beginning to feel as if someone has beat the living shit out of me.