starbelliedboy

Tiffany and I are in a bit of a weird place right now. Our relationship's seeming to become very intense. We're both stressed out a lot right now, looking for new jobs, trying to get school work done and all. We fight more now, over stupid stuff like her wanting to sleep all the time(possibly caused by the stress itself) and her pot smoking (which REALLY causes me severe distress, and is, I suppose, yet another way she deals with this stress). It's not as if it's legal or good for her. There are certainly enough arguments against it, but I don't even bother with those, she knows them and they won't help. The only thing I've really got is that it upsets me. And she's not horrible about it. She doesn't smoke in front of me... But at parties, she'll go off with the other pot smoking crowd, and sometimes I'll see her stuff out when I come to see her. She says it makes her happy and horny, and that I should be happy about that. Honestly, all that knowledge does is make me suspect that every time I find her in a good mood, it's drug induced. On Friday, we got into what seemed like an almost relationship ending fight about it. I wish I could be ok with it, I've tried not to let it bother me, but it always does. I don't know how long we'll be able to last before one of us changes our minds.

Among the fights, there's plenty of love to be had. Most of the time, it's great, and I really love her. But there are times when she's happy and I feel good to be with her, and I have to wonder if we're only happy because she had a good toke before I came over.