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st_jimmy

Member Since 2004

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Sunday May 08, 2005

May 8, 2005
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All The Love In The World

Watching all the insects march along
Seem to know just right where they belong
Smears of face reflecting in the chrome
Hiding in the crowd I'm all alone

No one's heard a single word I've said
They don't sound as good outside my head
Looks as though the past is here to stay
I've become a million miles away

Why do you get all the love in the world?

All the jagged edges disappear
Colors all look brighter when you're near
All the stars afire in the sky
Sometimes I get so lonely I could

Why do you get all the love in the world?

Why am I always watching from the outside?
On the other side of the glass behind glass
Always watching everyone separate
Watching always don't touch this is getting deeper
As time goes by the water's getting colder
Here I am surrounded by people but still all alone
Even with myself imprisoned in my head
And there doesn't seem to be any way to get out
And I am so fucking sick of here wish I was there
Right beside is still a million miles away
Behind these bars in a rut anyplace will do

Hello? Didn't think so
Broadcasting only static coming in
No one can hear me when I'm in here

Trent Reznor
======================================
just one of those days i guess...where im feeling pretty beat up. not really trying to read in to things to much and trying really hard not to look in to my past much either. cause really would good does it do? to look in to your past. yeah you can look back on the good times ... but some times the bad out way the good, this is one of those's days when all you can see and feel are the times that hurt the most. the times when you cryied your self to sleep, when you felt like you couldnt reach out to the one you loved, when you did reach out and there was no one there to reach out to, when all you needed was that one hug or kiss to make it all go away, when all you needed was that look and you would know it all would be ok, and when you woke up that morning to find that almost over night it was all over, to find that you where asleep down staires and her up stairs and no one in the bed that we once shared, or to find that there was no longer anyone on the other end of the phone, when that vocie you looked to for comfort was no longer there, to come home and find that the one on the other end has left you as well.
this is one of those days when all i can bring my self to do is (through a pitty party for my self). when you know it isnt you but them, but at the same time you wish it was you and that the one you loved didnt have to feel pain, didnt have to hurt. and in this party there is only me cause the sad truth is..damit i just lost my train of thought....
so crazy im 25 and feel so very old like i have already lived a life time i wounder who i was in my past life? so yeah this is just a down day and as i sit here i can look out my window and its one of the most beautiful days so far this week. I can barely bring my self to appreciate it.
back to being 25... there are so many things i would love to do with my self ... but most of all i want to have a family more then anything i want the whole thing the wife and kid's and the ups and downs that come along with it..(side thought) ever feel like your running out of time? Back to what i was saying... i have really only had 3 woman in my life that really ment anything to me one was my ex-wife the other the woman i feel in love with both ended badly one of which i tried to hold on to... not so much in a romantic way just to hold ... Now i find my self with a truly amazing woman who i would say has so much going for her she's done a lot with her self and from all that i know she's come al;ong way. i'm so very happy to have her in my life. i only hope she knows that.
only time will tell where this goes.

well before i run out of space i better stop...

current emotions: love surreal frown confused mad robot blush shocked smile
railh:
you are still working on that set? damn..............you need some help?
life is good right now! just chillin and taking fotos! how are thingd with you?
May 8, 2005
railh:
yeh but i read at fifth grade level!!!
May 8, 2005

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