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In my latest frenzy of organization, I found this postcard buried in some drawer in the decrepit desk I've had in my desk since I moved in almost four years ago. Well, I found alot of them, but one strikes me: "My most precious Catherine", it starts out. I never even dated this guy, but he would write me the most wonderful letters from the Middle East, where he was serving in the Navy. He was from my hometown, and emailed me after he read an opinion piece I wrote in the local newspaper. Each one was so genuinely sweet and loving, each signed "Love from your most loyal and sincere friend, Chris." God damn me for being seventeen and shallow-- he wasn't attractive, so I never really thought of him as anything beyond a bit of entertainment.
There's been alot of reminiscing on my part recently. My brother and sister start high school in the fall, the same school I went to. So of course they had me pull out my highschool yearbook and go through it, telling them about teachers and all. I Googled some former classmates of mine, people that I haven't thought of in ages but noticed in the yearbook. One is a molecular biologist, one is some form of engineer. I was like "whoa, what am I doing with my life?" But I never was one for flashy titles or a string of letters behind my name. "Mrs." suits me just fine.
Does everyone go through this in their early twenties? I've never felt my age, I've always felt older (or is it that everyone else seems younger?). It's like I'm having a midlife crisis at the tender age of 22.
I am at the point wher I am trying so hard to get oragnized that I have pulled everything out, and now I'm completely overwhelmed. I have to go to my grandmother's anyway now, hopefully while I'm there I can come up with a plan of attack.