My father is dying. I am not OK with that, but he has asked me not to be there. I respect that because I know in the end he wants to retain the dignity and respect he has in his eyes. Who am I to take that away from him? It is a hard choice to stay away from those you love in the end and it isn't one I have made. But my sister has taken this all from her perspective and says "I don't want to feel guilty 20 years down the road." she can't even accept his choice. It upsets and saddens me because while my hesitance to run to him now makes many think I am a bad person in the end my main goal is to make him happy in the end of his life. So fuck her and fuck you for condemning me. Life is death because that is all it ever ends up being. So live as my father has: rough hard, alive; and die with pride and dignity. Don't let those who suck the life out of you take that away from you like my sister would.
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Sorry, family issues. :-)
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Sorry, family issues. :-)
urblueygrl:
its a hard decision to make but in the end your doing the right thing by respecting his wishes and not being selfish and doing what would make you feel better. Its a hard thing to do but people should have the right to die with dignity in the way that they choose.