spikybluegirl

so i watched requiem for a dream for the first time last night... on very little sleep... it was in no way a good idea except that it made me realize there was no way i could take care of my friend who is going to trip tonight.

in other news, i got really drunk and pretty high with 2 cute bi girls and a...
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you are dark and careless with me.
you are light and full of grace.
you are the star i hang my hopes upon
chilly and sharp, badly drawn.
my breath catches on your edges and hangs me
in a tentative balance between adoring and despising you.
all i never wanted congealed and formed you
god you are imperfect
i slit my wrists on your power....
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You undid my head.
That was already undone.
This lost lamb was not led astray by you.
So why do I cry for you?
Why do I point my finger your way?
What blame could I lay upon you,
When I am only what I was?
I admit it, I set you up to knock me down.
Hell, I don't know what I did.
I...
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yesterday i noticed i loved you/ i'm holding my life like a weapon above you/ i have no more words i've spent them/ if we want a dance we will have to invent them

i tell you, i let myself get turned insideout for the tiniest things, and the things everyone else thinks are big never fucking touch me.

mm, i'd almost say i'd rather...
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inescapability. incorrigable. bliss-eating. aura-draining. heartrending. you. you. you. morning glory. dewy. moist. juices seeping. lust-worthy. consumable. discomforting. you. you. you. consuming. velvet. silken. serpentine. lithe. ease of being. idolatry. undulating. midnight blue. nothing so much as you. not even death could wake me now. not even the earth can shake this fear. no one so small as me. you own me. you. you. you. spiritual....
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Back... I don't think I'll ever spend that much time in Ohio again. I used to go back for my ex-girlfriend, but now that she's moved to Texas, it seems pointless to sit in my old room and read for a week and a half, stopping every few hours to see my mom for 5 minutes.

So I'm not an Ohioan anymore... it's official.

I'm marrying Isobel, and buying a bigass mansion out in the middle of nowhere where we can have more sex than you can shake a stick at.


Just thought you'd all like to know.

In other news, I didn't get my damn toaster for Christmas. Still holding out hope that mom got one for me. And I think I'm going to write some lyrics for...
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Bloody buggery fuck. Thunderstorms scare me when I'm living in a fuckin trailer...

Prefab home, whatever. It came in on a truck, anyway. Merry Christmas, happy holidays, and is there such thing as pagan judaism?

Sitting around watching Scooby Doo in Spanish is about the perfect way to spend Christmas Eve.

Happy Holidays everyone.

Next week I'll have to stay away from SG alllll week... I don't know how I'm gonna deal!
And I'll be stuck in the same house as my stepdad.

Other than that, things are good. Back to enjoying hott grrrls.

What a day

Took the exgirlfriend who dumped me, like, 2 weeks ago, to Disney. Was hoping for ex action, because I honestly feel like it would have given me closure.

She's moving to Maine, but she'll be back in 7 months. And the kind thing to do would be to tell me that there is no hope of us ever getting back together. Or...
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