Young Ed Bloom: There's a time when a man needs to fight and a time when he needs to accept that his destiny's lost, the ship has sailed and that only a fool will continue. The truth is I've always been a fool.
Senior Ed Bloom: You are in for a surprise.
Will Bloom: Am I?
Senior Ed Bloom: Havin' a kid changes everything. There's the diapers, and the burping, and the midnight feeding.
Will Bloom: Did you do any of that?
Senior Ed Bloom: Nope. But I hear it's terrible. Then you spend years trying to corrupt and mislead this child, fill his head with nonsense, and still it turns out perfectly fine.
Will Bloom: You think I'm up for it?
Senior Ed Bloom: You learned from the best.
Senior Ed Bloom: They say, when you meet the love of your life, time stops, and that's true. What they don't tell you is that when it starts again, it moves extra fast to catch up.
Senior Ed Bloom: You are in for a surprise.
Will Bloom: Am I?
Senior Ed Bloom: Havin' a kid changes everything. There's the diapers, and the burping, and the midnight feeding.
Will Bloom: Did you do any of that?
Senior Ed Bloom: Nope. But I hear it's terrible. Then you spend years trying to corrupt and mislead this child, fill his head with nonsense, and still it turns out perfectly fine.
Will Bloom: You think I'm up for it?
Senior Ed Bloom: You learned from the best.
Senior Ed Bloom: They say, when you meet the love of your life, time stops, and that's true. What they don't tell you is that when it starts again, it moves extra fast to catch up.