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spacelola

I moved away awhile ago and I've lived in various places... I suffer from wanderlust.....

Member Since 2008

Followers 227 Following 134

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Friday Aug 01, 2008

Aug 1, 2008
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So I am confused how people can be friends with their ex's.... Isn't there a reason, a distinct reason that you broke up in the first place? Being friends with them seems to be strange and almost a form of torture.... Let's remind ourselves everyday why we had a failing relationship... Doesn't make sense...
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katieokiedokie:
hmmm... I guess it all depends on why the two people broke up in the first place.. and how they treated each other afterwards that matters! Some people just know they aren't meant for each other, or with each other and are better off as friends. If they can end the relationship.. and remains friends (just friends) then I really don't see the problem with it. However there needs to be boundries in the friendship I believe.. lines that shouldn't be crossed..and if one or both of them cross that line.. it's time to end that friendship.. cause like you said it failed for a reason..and really it doesn't make sense.. and unless they both have changed majorly they will continue to go around and round in cicles!

Personally.. it would depend on the situation for me.. I have MAJOR trust issues because of my past 28 years of life..and things I've seen and lived through, and how I've been hurt and those feelings would play a VERY big part in how I felt.. I like to control situations too..because if I'm in control..I feel I'm more then likely not going to get hurt! Both are not good things! Another factor would be how HE felt about her while they were going out, and after they broke up!

My advice to you.. if you find yourself in this situation.. be honest and open with the guy you are seeing, and let him know how you feel, if it's bothering you tell him how you feel about it! Be open, be honest, and most of all communicate! I think the biggest reason people fail at relationship is they don't talk, and they are not open with each other! I sometimes think guys should be able to read my mind.. I'm learning. no that's not true..I have to say it out loud! lol.. If you don't let someone know your expectations, they will never know.. if you don't let them know it bothers you then they will never know! Especially guys.. we girls can signs, and pick up on body language.. I'm learning from having two best friends who are guys.. that's not so with them..they don't pay attention to that stuff! So you have to be extra assertive with them! So talk.. let him know.. and then it's in his court!

No one warned you that I write novels huh? lol.. Oop! I do.. lol..
Aug 1, 2008
heidiness:
i'm only still friends with one of my ex's and we were good friends before we started dating. we wanted to try dating and failed... didn't talk for a couple months then went back to being best friends. we're both married now and get along with each others' spouse (he gets a long way too well with my husband, lol)... so it works, but normally it never works out that way...
Aug 1, 2008

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