sorrow

ok today has been a good day for me!! kind of. well i have been having alot of health problems and stress problems as well. And I havent been so psyched on how school is going, im notlearning very much, notgetting personal guidance and or teaching and i feel like i am wasting time and money. I thought I would like beauty school and working in a salon afterwardbutnow that I have experianced it, I dontlike it!! which makes me sadand frustrated, cuz I realised today that im not sure what i want to do with my life. I have alot of interests,passions, andnotto brag, but talentsalso. I need something that i love, make alot of money with, and also challenges me. so I have decided to quit beauty school! but thats not the hard part, its telling my grandparents. who have paid all the tuition so far, it has only been 4 monthsof tuition so itsnota whole lot. But I am going to tell them, then im gonna get another job,work my ass off and pay them back. by that time i willhave had sufficient time to get a handleon my health, turn my stress and over emotion into motivation and driveto get out there and possibly go to film school, or be completely independant and do makeup, hairupdos, making clothing, modeling, and acting and filming . and then travel my ass off!! I know i may notbe making alot of sense right now, cuz i type like i think, which isnt that orderly and sensible. but you get the idea im giving myself an intervention ofsome sort! so any life advice, wordsofwisdom, encouragement, oranything you have to offerismuch appreciated!!!
but on top of that my boyfriend and i made alot of progress today and got a bit closer!! i admire andlove him so much for putiing up with me and being willing to make changes in order to support and share his life with me!! I I am a very lucky girl to be where and who i am today!!