soraya

theres black sabbath blasting out of the warehouse at my work. funny.

so something really funny happened to me earlier today. well, its probably one of those things where it was hilarious for me but when i tell the story to other people im still busting up laughing, barely able to even say the words through my laughter and snorts, and they are all just sitting there, waiting for the funny part.

ok. so i was taking a five minute break from work. we walk across the street to the donut shop cause im having these crazy cravings for a glazed donut. (which i havent had since i ate way too many donuts about two years ago when i was staying up all night for like 2 weeks watching the whole twin peak series on video and i would suddenly have to have donuts and coffee so we would go down to the donut shop and by scratcher tickets and donuts and coffee and sometimes i would win an extra ticket or even $2).

alright. so were walking to the donut shop. and for all of you, this story is not even that funny unless youve seen the movie dude, wheres my car. and you know that scene (which is pretty much really fucking stupid, but some how cracked my shit up) where they are at the drive thru fast food place and that lady keeps saying and then in that fucking voice over and over.
so my coworker and i have this running joke where we will randomly spit out and then to each other in that crazy voice. for whatever reason, without fail, it will bust my shit up.... tourettes i guess. i understand it.
alright. no more sidenotes. so we walk into the donut shop and i order a raised glazed donut. and the donut lady says and. and i say and, a glazed old fashioned and then she says and then. and then i say thats it. and she says and then....
so this already was funny enough in and of itself. since it was very similar to that scene in the movie. so i have my two-second laugh about it. and then forget about it.
so about five minutes later. im eating my donut and in mid-bite, my coworker says subtly, under her breath and then... so, of course, i fucking crack up laughing..... as well as start choking on the chunk of donut in my mouth. its lodged in my throat. im trying not to laugh cause im choking, but its hilarious. its like a really bad movie- my life is flashing before my eyes and im coming to the realization that i am going to die, choking on a glazed donut in the warehouse under fluorescent lights putting away butt plugs and gummy boobs the unreality of it all. my coworker is laughing and finally realizes i am not ok. she slams her hand down on my back. and the chunk of donut flies back out of my throat.

i still feel glazed donut slime trapped in my sinuses... yum.

my geek orchid obsessed ass is going to the pacific orchid expo this weekend. which is the equivalent of a trekkie going to a star trek convention basically. yup. thats me. fucking geek-fest. and loving it.