soraya

in the morning while sitting on the bus in the middle of a daze of thoughts along the lines of i really hate taking the damn bus and will there ever be a normal and calm bus ride to work? and sometimes i really just need to get the hell out of the city before i go crazy and you know, its always the yuppie girl with the travel coffee mug thats about to spill her fucking scorching coffee on someones lap...better not be mine and why the hell does the back door always get stuck...piece of ass bus.....
well, while i was reading and these little thoughts sort of streamlined their way through my head i read something that kinda just stuck and i wanted to share it.. i guess it just found a place in my heart, perhaps, due to the years i worked in a particular type of um, store, always getting the same idiotic questions from customers; and the many times ive felt like i was going to lose it amidst the constant chaotic brashes with humanity itself...namely the ever so predictable bus ride.
yeah... so here it is:

...Here are condoms lined with a topical anesthetic for prolonged action. What a paradox. You dont feel a thing, but you can fuck for hours.
This seems to really miss the point.
I want my whole life lined with a topical anesthetic.

no shit. some days as i maneuver myself through the world sometimes i wish i was so numb that i couldnt feel life fucking me and everyone else so hard.

and, yes, there are those other days where i am so grateful that im not. yeah, i know, gotta stay open for the good stuff too. maybe i just need a better filter or something. keep the good in and filter out all that other crap.

oh, and yeah, and that quote is from palahniuk...