A funny story... and a sad story..
So I have my hair in a shitty little mohawk... since I can't grow my hair long... this has to do for whatever free time I get. Anyway, on the way to class thursday night, I stop in 7-11.... I am walking around, trying to decide what kind of cheap processed crap to buy so I don't starve during class. The woman behind the counter (Arabic mind you) ask me if I need help. Now I have been in 7-11 some 12459 times in my life and I have NEVER been offered help... and I knew why she was asking... the hair... black pants, black tshirt, black hoodie... I was scary to her I guess... anyway... I say no thanks and go about my buisness... about a minute later she ask again.. and I again say no... she stares at me as I continue to gather crap. When I get to the checkout I politely say...
"You know, I don't really think this way... but most people in this country look at you and they see a terrorist... that's not right is it?"' and she says No...
I tell her that it isn't polite then to judge people based on a silly haircut... and she says to me that "you can never be too carefull"... I just nod and say uh huh. Anyway, I pay for my crap and then say thanks... then I look at her and let out the longest, throat grating scream I could muster... must have went for 20 seconds at least... then I smiled and left... I will NEVER go to that 7-11 again.
Sad story.
My little brother has taken his newfound duties a father very seriously. He is very in love with that kid... and I think that is great. I can not imagine being 17 with a kid... but he is pulling it off. Anyway, I am talking to my grandmother the other night and she says to me that she thinks the baby (now near 3 months old I guess?) is blind. I ask her why she thinks that and she tells me how she does not respond to any visual stimulation. Wave a finger in front of her eye, and nothing. So I just kind of dismiss it somewhat.. .thinking that my grandmother just might not be around the baby enough to notice. Well, I am talking to my mom today and she says the same thing. Since my brother and the baby are living with my mom, I guess she sees the kid all the time. She too said there was nothing going on in her eyes, and that they looked blank and lifeless. She tells me that the baby was in the birth canal for over 45 minutes before the doctor decided to do a c-section. I knew that when the baby was born it took a few minutes to get it breathing and my mom thought it was dead when it popped out. Now... mom said my brother has no clue about this... my brother thinks the baby is doing great... he is a proud dad...
Two things about this really bother me... first... if this kid is blind, then that is so fucking sad... for her (the baby), and for my brother... Secondly.. .whenever someone tells me god has a plan for everyone, I want to fucking punch them... what kind of plan is it to make someones life more difficult?
The whole adage that "life isn't fair" is really true... I think I am a decent person, but I am far from innocent... and I am in good health... and this beautiful baby is born, and is innocent, and... may never get to see anything... may never get to see her father, or mother, or herself, or the sun, or moon, or stars, or ocean, or the countless other beautiful things on earth.
If there is a god, I really doubt he has as much control as everyone thinks... at this point I think he is just sitting back and letting whatever happens happen.
end with a song...
i've used hammers made out of wood
i've have played games with peices and rules
i've undeciphered tricks at the bar
but now your gone
i havent figured out why
i've come up with riddles
and jokes about war
i've figured out numbers and what there for
i've understood feelings
and i've understood words
but how could you be taken away
and where ever you've gone
and where ever we might go
it don't seem fair
today just disapeared
your lives reflected now
reflected from afar
we were but stones
your light made us stars
with heavy breath
awaken regrets
back pages and days alone that coulda been spent
together but we're
miles apart
every inch between us becomes light years now
no time to be void
or save up on life
oh you gotta spend it all
and wherever you've gone
and wherever we might go
it don't seem fair
you seemed to like it here
your lives reflected now
reflected from afar
we were but stones
your light made us stars
/end song
I know no one has died... but the fairness aspect hits home
//sigh
So I have my hair in a shitty little mohawk... since I can't grow my hair long... this has to do for whatever free time I get. Anyway, on the way to class thursday night, I stop in 7-11.... I am walking around, trying to decide what kind of cheap processed crap to buy so I don't starve during class. The woman behind the counter (Arabic mind you) ask me if I need help. Now I have been in 7-11 some 12459 times in my life and I have NEVER been offered help... and I knew why she was asking... the hair... black pants, black tshirt, black hoodie... I was scary to her I guess... anyway... I say no thanks and go about my buisness... about a minute later she ask again.. and I again say no... she stares at me as I continue to gather crap. When I get to the checkout I politely say...
"You know, I don't really think this way... but most people in this country look at you and they see a terrorist... that's not right is it?"' and she says No...
I tell her that it isn't polite then to judge people based on a silly haircut... and she says to me that "you can never be too carefull"... I just nod and say uh huh. Anyway, I pay for my crap and then say thanks... then I look at her and let out the longest, throat grating scream I could muster... must have went for 20 seconds at least... then I smiled and left... I will NEVER go to that 7-11 again.
Sad story.
My little brother has taken his newfound duties a father very seriously. He is very in love with that kid... and I think that is great. I can not imagine being 17 with a kid... but he is pulling it off. Anyway, I am talking to my grandmother the other night and she says to me that she thinks the baby (now near 3 months old I guess?) is blind. I ask her why she thinks that and she tells me how she does not respond to any visual stimulation. Wave a finger in front of her eye, and nothing. So I just kind of dismiss it somewhat.. .thinking that my grandmother just might not be around the baby enough to notice. Well, I am talking to my mom today and she says the same thing. Since my brother and the baby are living with my mom, I guess she sees the kid all the time. She too said there was nothing going on in her eyes, and that they looked blank and lifeless. She tells me that the baby was in the birth canal for over 45 minutes before the doctor decided to do a c-section. I knew that when the baby was born it took a few minutes to get it breathing and my mom thought it was dead when it popped out. Now... mom said my brother has no clue about this... my brother thinks the baby is doing great... he is a proud dad...
Two things about this really bother me... first... if this kid is blind, then that is so fucking sad... for her (the baby), and for my brother... Secondly.. .whenever someone tells me god has a plan for everyone, I want to fucking punch them... what kind of plan is it to make someones life more difficult?
The whole adage that "life isn't fair" is really true... I think I am a decent person, but I am far from innocent... and I am in good health... and this beautiful baby is born, and is innocent, and... may never get to see anything... may never get to see her father, or mother, or herself, or the sun, or moon, or stars, or ocean, or the countless other beautiful things on earth.
If there is a god, I really doubt he has as much control as everyone thinks... at this point I think he is just sitting back and letting whatever happens happen.
end with a song...
i've used hammers made out of wood
i've have played games with peices and rules
i've undeciphered tricks at the bar
but now your gone
i havent figured out why
i've come up with riddles
and jokes about war
i've figured out numbers and what there for
i've understood feelings
and i've understood words
but how could you be taken away
and where ever you've gone
and where ever we might go
it don't seem fair
today just disapeared
your lives reflected now
reflected from afar
we were but stones
your light made us stars
with heavy breath
awaken regrets
back pages and days alone that coulda been spent
together but we're
miles apart
every inch between us becomes light years now
no time to be void
or save up on life
oh you gotta spend it all
and wherever you've gone
and wherever we might go
it don't seem fair
you seemed to like it here
your lives reflected now
reflected from afar
we were but stones
your light made us stars
/end song
I know no one has died... but the fairness aspect hits home
//sigh
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On another note, are you going to see X in Dec.?
hope you are doing well.