-livejournal post-
today i thought a lot about selling my car off and buying a scooter
i always want a scooter in the summer. always glad i have a car in the winter.
lots of pros and cons on both sides of that
i signed up and paid for three months membership to a popular soft-porn site. it's much more than that really, but it's the closest thing to a girlfriend im going to let myself have for awhile. the women are individualistic and interesting...the pictures artistic and vividly beautiful. still..i feel a bit odd about it. it's weird posting my profile and having 'youth advocate' as my job title floating around with all those naked people. but shit, i'm not ashamed. you don't have to let michael jackson fuck up your love for children. i dont have to stop talking about how i like beautiful women just as much, but in a vastly different way. see, even that sounds weird. maybe i'll just tell them i wait tables still.
which i do. one day a week. decided to keep that job for just that one day a week. it's a long day, with long hours, and it'll at least keep me stocked in sandwhiches for a few days after i work there.
dusty has a new place and it's nice. the dog is especially wonderful. i like dusty a bit more than i like the dog. dusty doesnt smell as bad.
played mario brothers again at his place.
almost bought a vespa. just about. ditch the car first? or just buy the scooter and save the car for long trips out of the city? decisions decisions.
oh yea,
and i start my new job tommorrow. have i mentioned that im completely flipping out about that? that im nervous, and scared, and afraid that my charm will evoporate when one of the older kids makes fun of me for being skinny and i just don't know how to respond? can't i just work with 4th graders again? *sigh*
no. i will love this new job because it's a career and its my life and i have to move on here. if i won't let myself be in love, then i can at least advance the work part of my life without cringing this much. everybody tells me i'll do great. i want to believe them, and so i do. most of the time.
in other news
the most beautiful rainbow in the history of my life came up and jumped all over me today. standing outside a restraunt after digging in some veggie chili and whatnot. the rainbow was huge and clear and amazing...spaned (by my perspective) miles and miles, all fully formed. it was an electrical storm with enough wet to form it. amazing and clear and beautiful.
adam
today i thought a lot about selling my car off and buying a scooter
i always want a scooter in the summer. always glad i have a car in the winter.
lots of pros and cons on both sides of that
i signed up and paid for three months membership to a popular soft-porn site. it's much more than that really, but it's the closest thing to a girlfriend im going to let myself have for awhile. the women are individualistic and interesting...the pictures artistic and vividly beautiful. still..i feel a bit odd about it. it's weird posting my profile and having 'youth advocate' as my job title floating around with all those naked people. but shit, i'm not ashamed. you don't have to let michael jackson fuck up your love for children. i dont have to stop talking about how i like beautiful women just as much, but in a vastly different way. see, even that sounds weird. maybe i'll just tell them i wait tables still.
which i do. one day a week. decided to keep that job for just that one day a week. it's a long day, with long hours, and it'll at least keep me stocked in sandwhiches for a few days after i work there.
dusty has a new place and it's nice. the dog is especially wonderful. i like dusty a bit more than i like the dog. dusty doesnt smell as bad.
played mario brothers again at his place.
almost bought a vespa. just about. ditch the car first? or just buy the scooter and save the car for long trips out of the city? decisions decisions.
oh yea,
and i start my new job tommorrow. have i mentioned that im completely flipping out about that? that im nervous, and scared, and afraid that my charm will evoporate when one of the older kids makes fun of me for being skinny and i just don't know how to respond? can't i just work with 4th graders again? *sigh*
no. i will love this new job because it's a career and its my life and i have to move on here. if i won't let myself be in love, then i can at least advance the work part of my life without cringing this much. everybody tells me i'll do great. i want to believe them, and so i do. most of the time.
in other news
the most beautiful rainbow in the history of my life came up and jumped all over me today. standing outside a restraunt after digging in some veggie chili and whatnot. the rainbow was huge and clear and amazing...spaned (by my perspective) miles and miles, all fully formed. it was an electrical storm with enough wet to form it. amazing and clear and beautiful.
adam
christopher:
No kidding about that rainbow. It scared the hell out of me.