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soeffinhappy

Philly

Member Since 2003

Followers 21 Following 30

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Tuesday Sep 30, 2003

Sep 30, 2003
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Newspaper taxis appear on the shore
A journal by Sean Fogarty
HOw's THIS for weird?
So the other day I'm on my way out from the mall wondering if they actually have a test to find out if you're nerdy enough to work at EB or if the managers there have some sort of really weird, uber-nerd esp, when I start to hold the door for a really old black woman. White hair, cane, limp, really thick glasses. The whole deal. She starts to try to run to get there in time but is obviously having a hard time of it. "Don't rush girl, I got all night" I tell her and smile. She goes through the door thanking me and telling me how nice I am. I open the outer door for her too and she continues to gush about my kindness.
"I was just admiring you from behind" she says "You've got quite a look about you. I really like your look."
At this point she completely looks me up and down and for the first time I know how a hot girl feels when they undressed by lecherous eyes. "Yes that's a great look you have going on. MMMM."
"Um, thanks, you have a good night."
Then I turn to walk away, the knowledge that she's probably doing that same up-and-down look as I go to my car causing a slight smile to touch my lips.
So a group of reports are sitting in an old time office, wearing old time fedora hats with PRESS tucked in the band and gabbing in those slightly high pitched old time voices about various stories that are going on, when someone bursts in and overlydramatically yells "FELLAS!!! I NEED HELP!! I'M BEHIND ON MY DEADLINE TO DETERMINE PRIME RATE!!!"
The reporters all look at each other with frowns and consider what to do.
"Well what should the banks be charging on a loan nowadays?" one asks.
"How bout four?" the voice comes from the slow janitor in the back, who overheard the conversation while mopping.
"SURE!!! HEY WHY NOT FELLAS?!? YOU'RE A GENIUS RICKY!!" The guy then runs back into his tiny office stacked high with loose papers.
That's the image that jumped into my head when I overheard my manager explaining to a new hire that "Our loans are based on Prime rate which is determined by the Wall Street Journal."
A girl at another branch told me that she doesn't believe in loans, that she'd rather just borrow money off of her parents. "After all if I'm late with my rent payment to my parents, what are they gonna do? Kick me out? Yeah right cause then I'd have to move back in with them." And that she was getting a "pretty good deal" on her car, a brand new Grand Prix fully loaded, cause the payment was 550 a month and she only had to pay 250. Then she went on to say how she didn't even fill out an application for this job until she was hired and that the only reason she has the job is because her mom worked for the company. Later, as we were closing she came to the conclusion that "I'm financially independent and I don't need anybody's money. I can take care of myself." Hmmmmmmmmmm.....
VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
voltaire:
I posted the soup recipe with directions in my jounal today, if you still want it .....
Oct 2, 2003
alexis:
You're too lazy to spam bomb my SG journal???!?!? Ah that's ok. You were hit on by an old black woman... at EB too of all places... you're my hero.

xoxo Alexis
Oct 2, 2003

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