snapdragonpoppy

I was supposed to go in and quit my part time job and insted I went in and asked to go full time, the thing is I was thining I'd quit the current ft and life would be good right, Like i might actualy find time to begin cultavating some kind of social life.

so any way the boss told me he didn't have any spots open and I know he does I think he may be irratated about my no call no show that was his fault any way, cause he said i could have those days off

so now i'll look like some kind of baby pitchinig a fit if i quit now, I need to quit one or the other and I think my casr of terminal confusiion has once again bitten me in the ass.

Also I spent the night at my house with my husband for the second time this month and it dosn't seem to be going as well as he thinks.
I sort of told him I have a crush on this guy Rob and I nearly had him agreeing to go to a strip club after our staff meeting, but Rob's wife would be realy put out about it so I can respect that and we didn't go, so I was telling my hubby about all this and he got all pissy.

It kind of irks me that he will say he's fine with me being bi and wanting to go out and have fun and also on several occasions he has " out of desperation " agreed to having an open marriage.

so he sais he's ok with all this and none of this is any kind of news but then His actions and behaviors say he's realy not cool with it.

I guess i'm realy just pissed cause I feel like I have to hide stuff from this man who I have and still feel like he's my best friend' we just ocasionaly sleep together. so that's the thing that to me sucke the biggest about our seperation. I guess even tho I left him I still miss him verry much some times, then we try to get together and.......

maybe we should just talk on the phone, maybe it's to soon to start all this reconcilliation talk.

I apreciate so much having a place to vent.

thanks