A married couple in their early 60s was celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary in a quiet, romantic little restaurant.
Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table. She said, 'For being such an exemplary married couple and for being loving to each other for all this time, I will grant you each a wish.'
The wife answered, 'Oh, I want to travel around...
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Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table. She said, 'For being such an exemplary married couple and for being loving to each other for all this time, I will grant you each a wish.'
The wife answered, 'Oh, I want to travel around...
Read More
bitten:
hahaha that was a good one. 
A professor at the University of North Carolina was giving a lecture on 'Involuntary Muscular Contractions' to his first year medical students. Realizing this was not the most riveting subject, the professor decided to lighten the mood slightly.
He pointed to a young woman in the front row and asked, 'Do you know what your ass hole is doing while you're having an orgasm?'
She...
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He pointed to a young woman in the front row and asked, 'Do you know what your ass hole is doing while you're having an orgasm?'
She...
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properpiper:
Thanks for commenting on my set!
A man asked an American Indian what was his wife's name.
He replied, "She called Five Horses".
The man said, "That's an unusual name for your wife.
What does it mean?"
The Old Indian answered,
"It old Indian Name. It mean...
NAG, NAG, NAG, NAG, NAG!
He replied, "She called Five Horses".
The man said, "That's an unusual name for your wife.
What does it mean?"
The Old Indian answered,
"It old Indian Name. It mean...
NAG, NAG, NAG, NAG, NAG!
WHEN TO START CUSSING!
A 6 year old and a 4 year old are upstairs in their bedroom. The 6 year old asks, "You know what? I think it's about time we started cussing." The 4 year old nods his head in approval. The 6 year old continues, "When we go downstairs for breakfast, I'm gonna say something with hell and you say something with...
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A 6 year old and a 4 year old are upstairs in their bedroom. The 6 year old asks, "You know what? I think it's about time we started cussing." The 4 year old nods his head in approval. The 6 year old continues, "When we go downstairs for breakfast, I'm gonna say something with hell and you say something with...
Read More
Bracelet at Tiffany's
A lady walks into Tiffany's. She looks around, spots a beautiful diamond bracelet and walks over to inspect it.
As she bends over to look more closely, she lets out a fart.
Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and prays that a sales person doesn't pop up right now.
As she turns around,...
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A lady walks into Tiffany's. She looks around, spots a beautiful diamond bracelet and walks over to inspect it.
As she bends over to look more closely, she lets out a fart.
Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and prays that a sales person doesn't pop up right now.
As she turns around,...
Read More
This is priceless - would love to do this.
One year at Thanksgiving, my mom went to my
sister's house for the traditional feast. Knowing
how gullible my sister is, my mom decided to
play a trick. She told my sister that she needed
something from the store.
When my sister left, my mom took the turkey out of
the oven, removed the stuffing, stuffed...
Read More
One year at Thanksgiving, my mom went to my
sister's house for the traditional feast. Knowing
how gullible my sister is, my mom decided to
play a trick. She told my sister that she needed
something from the store.
When my sister left, my mom took the turkey out of
the oven, removed the stuffing, stuffed...
Read More
Grandma's boyfriend
A 5-year-old boy went to visit his grandmother one day. Playing with his toys in her bedroom while grandma was dusting, he looked up and said, 'Grandma, how come you don't have a boyfriend now that Grandpa went to heaven?'
Grandma replied, 'Honey, my TV is my boyfriend. I can sit in my bedroom and watch it all day long. The religious programs...
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A 5-year-old boy went to visit his grandmother one day. Playing with his toys in her bedroom while grandma was dusting, he looked up and said, 'Grandma, how come you don't have a boyfriend now that Grandpa went to heaven?'
Grandma replied, 'Honey, my TV is my boyfriend. I can sit in my bedroom and watch it all day long. The religious programs...
Read More
FIVE RULES FOR MEN TO FOLLOW FOR A HAPPY LIFE:
1. It's important to have a woman, who helps at home,
who cooks from time to time, cleans up and has a job.
2. It's important to have a woman, who can make you
laugh.
3. It's important to have a woman, who you can trust
and who doesn't lie to you.
4. It's important...
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1. It's important to have a woman, who helps at home,
who cooks from time to time, cleans up and has a job.
2. It's important to have a woman, who can make you
laugh.
3. It's important to have a woman, who you can trust
and who doesn't lie to you.
4. It's important...
Read More
markedfaery:
Would be way better if they all got along and shared cocktails together on Sunday! 
snafu371964:
Right, Wouldn't it though!?!?!?!! Can't we all just get along???
This is hilarious!!! Remember this the next time you need to return something
and they are giving you a hard time!!
A woman went to the service counter and told the clerk she wanted a refund for the toaster she bought because it won't work. The clerk told her that he can't give her a refund because she bought it on special.
Suddenly, the woman...
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and they are giving you a hard time!!
A woman went to the service counter and told the clerk she wanted a refund for the toaster she bought because it won't work. The clerk told her that he can't give her a refund because she bought it on special.
Suddenly, the woman...
Read More
Four friends spend weeks planning the perfect backwoods camping and
fishing trip.
Two days before the group is to leave Frank's wife puts her foot down
and tells him he isn't going.
Frank's friends are very upset that he can't go, but what can they do?
Two days later the three get to the camping site only to find Frank sitting
there with a tent...
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fishing trip.
Two days before the group is to leave Frank's wife puts her foot down
and tells him he isn't going.
Frank's friends are very upset that he can't go, but what can they do?
Two days later the three get to the camping site only to find Frank sitting
there with a tent...
Read More