snafu371964

A hooded robber burst into a Texas Bank and forced the tellers to load a sack full of cash.

On his way out the door a brave Texas customer grabbed the hood and pulled it off revealing the robber's face.

The robber shot the customer without a moment's hesitation. He then looked around the bank and noticed one of the tellers looking straight at him....
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LITTLE KEVIN WAS IN HIS 5TH GRADE CLASS WHEN THE TEACHER ASKED THE CHILDREN WHAT THEIR FATHERS DID FOR A LIVING.

ALL THE TYPICAL ANSWERS CAME UP: FIREMAN, POLICEMAN, SALESMAN, ETC. KEVIN WAS BEING QUIET, SO THE TEACHER ASKED HIM ABOUT HIS FATHER.

LITTLE KEVIN SAYS: MY FATHER'S AN EXOTIC DANCER IN A GAY BAR AND TAKES OFF ALL HIS CLOTHES IN FRONT OF OTHER...
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CATHOLIC HORSES


One day while he was at the track playing the ponies and all but losing
his shirt, Mitch noticed a priest who stepped out onto the track and
blessed the forehead of one of the horses lining up for the 4th race.
Lo and behold, the horse, a very long-shot, won the race.

Before the next race, as the horses began lining up,...
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Little Johnny watched his Daddy's' car pass by the school playground and go into the woods. Curious, he followed the car and saw Daddy and Aunt Jane in a passionate embrace.

Little Johnny found this so exciting that he could hardly contain himself as he ran home and started to tell his mother.

'Mommy, I was at the playground and I saw Daddy's car go...
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Here's a truly heartwarming story about the bond formed between a little 5-year-old girl and some construction workers that will make you believe that we all can make a difference when we give a child the gift of our time.

A young family moved into a house, next to a vacant lot. One day, a construction crew turned up to start building a house on...
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A cabbie picks up a nun. She gets into the cab, and notices that the very handsome cab driver won't stop staring at her. She asks, "Why are you staring?"
He replies, 'I have a question to ask, but I don't want to offend you.'
She answers, "My son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am and have been a nun...
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A man is walking home alone late one foggy Halloween night, when behind him he hears:

BUMP...

BUMP...

BUMP...

Walking faster, he looks back and through the fog he makes out the image of an upright casket banging its way down the middle of the street toward him.

BUMP...

BUMP...

Terrified, the man begins to run toward his home, the casket bouncing quickly behind him....
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Two informally dressed ladies happened to start a conversation
during an endless wait in the LAX airport in Los Angeles.

The first lady was an arrogant California woman married to a wealthy man.

The second was a well-mannered elderly woman from the South.

When the conversation centered on whether they had any children,
the California woman started by saying, "When my first child
was born,...
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A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, 'Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get started.'

Her boyfriend asks, 'What is it supposed to be when it's finished?'

The blonde says, 'According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster.'

Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle......
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Edward, an old retired sailor, puts on his old uniform and heads for the docks once more, for old times sake.

He engages a prostitute and takes her up to a room.

He's soon going at it as well as he can for a guy his age, but needing some reassurance, he asks, 'How am I doing?'

The prostitute replies, 'Well Ray, you old sailor,...
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