CATHOLIC HORSES
One day while he was at the track playing the ponies and all but losing
his shirt, Mitch noticed a priest who stepped out onto the track and
blessed the forehead of one of the horses lining up for the 4th race.
Lo and behold, the horse, a very long-shot, won the race.
Before the next race, as the horses began lining up, Mitch watched with
interest the old priest step onto the track. Sure enough, as the 5th
race horses came to the starting gate the priest made a blessing on the
forehead of one of the horses.
Mitch made a beeline for a betting window and placed a small bet on the
horse. Again, even though it was another long-shot, the horse the
priest had blessed won the race.
Mitch collected his winnings, and anxiously waited to see which horse
the priest would bless for the 6th race. The priest again blessed a
horse. Mitch bet big on it, and it won.
Mitch was elated. As the races continued the priest kept blessing
long-shot horses, and each one ended up coming in first. By and by,
Mitch was pulling in some serious money. By the last race, he knew his
wildest dreams were going to come true. He made a quick dash to the ATM,
withdrew
all his savings, and awaited the priest's blessing that would tell him
which horse to bet on.
True to his pattern, the priest stepped onto the track for the last
race and blessed the forehead of an old nag that was the longest shot of
the day. Mitch also observed the priest blessing the eyes, ears and
hooves of the old nag.
Mitch knew he had a winner and bet every cent he owned on the old nag.
He then watched dumbfounded as the old nag come in dead last. Mitch, in
a state of shock, made his way down to the track area where the priest
was.
Confronting the old priest he demanded, "Father! What happened? All day
long you blessed horses and they all won. Then in the last race, the
horse you blessed lost by a Kentucky mile. Now, thanks to you I've
lost every cent of my savings - all of it!".
The priest nodded wisely and with sympathy, "Son," he said, "that's the
problem with you Protestants, you can't tell the difference between a
simple blessing and last rites!"
One day while he was at the track playing the ponies and all but losing
his shirt, Mitch noticed a priest who stepped out onto the track and
blessed the forehead of one of the horses lining up for the 4th race.
Lo and behold, the horse, a very long-shot, won the race.
Before the next race, as the horses began lining up, Mitch watched with
interest the old priest step onto the track. Sure enough, as the 5th
race horses came to the starting gate the priest made a blessing on the
forehead of one of the horses.
Mitch made a beeline for a betting window and placed a small bet on the
horse. Again, even though it was another long-shot, the horse the
priest had blessed won the race.
Mitch collected his winnings, and anxiously waited to see which horse
the priest would bless for the 6th race. The priest again blessed a
horse. Mitch bet big on it, and it won.
Mitch was elated. As the races continued the priest kept blessing
long-shot horses, and each one ended up coming in first. By and by,
Mitch was pulling in some serious money. By the last race, he knew his
wildest dreams were going to come true. He made a quick dash to the ATM,
withdrew
all his savings, and awaited the priest's blessing that would tell him
which horse to bet on.
True to his pattern, the priest stepped onto the track for the last
race and blessed the forehead of an old nag that was the longest shot of
the day. Mitch also observed the priest blessing the eyes, ears and
hooves of the old nag.
Mitch knew he had a winner and bet every cent he owned on the old nag.
He then watched dumbfounded as the old nag come in dead last. Mitch, in
a state of shock, made his way down to the track area where the priest
was.
Confronting the old priest he demanded, "Father! What happened? All day
long you blessed horses and they all won. Then in the last race, the
horse you blessed lost by a Kentucky mile. Now, thanks to you I've
lost every cent of my savings - all of it!".
The priest nodded wisely and with sympathy, "Son," he said, "that's the
problem with you Protestants, you can't tell the difference between a
simple blessing and last rites!"