snafu371964

The wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love to
a very attractive young woman.

And she was somewhat upset. 'You are a disrespectful pig!' she cried. 'How
dare you do this to me -- a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm
leaving you. I want a divorce right away!'

And the husband replied, 'Hang on just a minute love, so at least I can tell
you what happened.' 'Fine, go ahead,' she sobbed,' but they'll be the last
words you'll say to me!'

And the husband began -- 'Well, I was getting into the car to drive home, and
this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and
defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car.

I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She told
me that she hadn't eaten for three days.

So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made
for you last night, the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put
on weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments.

Since she needed a good clean-up, I suggested a shower, and while she was
doing that, I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes, so I threw
them away.

Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had
for a few years, but don't wear because you say they are too tight.

I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you
don't wear because I don't have good taste.

I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't wear
just to annoy her, and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive
boutique and don't wear because someone at work has a pair the same.'

The husband took a quick breath and continued - 'She was so grateful for my
understanding and help that as I walked her to the door, she turned to me with
tears in her eyes and said, 'Please, do you have anything else that your wife
doesn't use?'