So, I am in a polyamorous relationship. I have been for a while.
Shirt from here!
For some reason it has been brought up in several situations in my life recently. For as out there I am about certain things in my life, other things I hold closer to my chest. I think this is one of those things.
If you are not familiar with polyamory, you should know that everyone involved in a polyamorous relationship has different "rules" for what is allowed and what is not.
Do not ever presume that since something that one person does carries over to another situation. We all know what happens when you assume, right?
For example, I can "get away with" more than what I am okay with what my #1 does on the side. I grew up in a household where boys and girls had different rules and for my adult life I have been dedicated to equality. Sometimes I feel guilty about not being 50/50 about things, but I can only do what I am comfortable with. That is something I have had to learn the hard way.
Polyamory is a sticky situation. When you confront social norms there is always some sort of backlash. I get called names, get weird looks, have assumptions made about my promiscuity. But it is one of those things; I am happy with how I lead my life. I am out to make friends, not assumptions. People who make assumptions about me are not friends of mine. I will openly talk about my boundaries, I always have.
I have been really lucky to have met, and gotten to know, some awesome poly people and poly couples. We are all learning, take a back seat and listen to what others have to say. It might not be your style, but opening your mind to other situations is what helps us all understand each other.
And like I have said, every situation is different, so I do not doubt that other poly people take issue with what I have said. So I open this up to discussion.
EDIT: I'm not looking for acceptance, as much as I am just informing/discussing. I know that how I lead my life isn't how others care to live. I am super happy with my life. I am strong in my beliefs.
Let's open our minds and grow.
♥
Shirt from here!
For some reason it has been brought up in several situations in my life recently. For as out there I am about certain things in my life, other things I hold closer to my chest. I think this is one of those things.
If you are not familiar with polyamory, you should know that everyone involved in a polyamorous relationship has different "rules" for what is allowed and what is not.
Do not ever presume that since something that one person does carries over to another situation. We all know what happens when you assume, right?
For example, I can "get away with" more than what I am okay with what my #1 does on the side. I grew up in a household where boys and girls had different rules and for my adult life I have been dedicated to equality. Sometimes I feel guilty about not being 50/50 about things, but I can only do what I am comfortable with. That is something I have had to learn the hard way.
Polyamory is a sticky situation. When you confront social norms there is always some sort of backlash. I get called names, get weird looks, have assumptions made about my promiscuity. But it is one of those things; I am happy with how I lead my life. I am out to make friends, not assumptions. People who make assumptions about me are not friends of mine. I will openly talk about my boundaries, I always have.
I have been really lucky to have met, and gotten to know, some awesome poly people and poly couples. We are all learning, take a back seat and listen to what others have to say. It might not be your style, but opening your mind to other situations is what helps us all understand each other.
And like I have said, every situation is different, so I do not doubt that other poly people take issue with what I have said. So I open this up to discussion.
EDIT: I'm not looking for acceptance, as much as I am just informing/discussing. I know that how I lead my life isn't how others care to live. I am super happy with my life. I am strong in my beliefs.
Let's open our minds and grow.
♥
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Go you.