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smithers_jones

Dicktown

Member Since 2003

Followers 39 Following 66

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Tuesday Feb 03, 2009

Feb 3, 2009
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Going to Vegas today for work. Did I mention I hate traveling for work? My boss seems to think its some big treat for me. Really it means I get to work a 14 hour day tomorrow and am forced to be away from the ones I love. My kittens are totally going to miss me.

Here's my stupid Facebook "My 25 things"

1. I kicked a cop in the head and didnt go to jail.

2. I talked Wanda Sykes into becoming an anarchist.

3. As a toddler, I taught myself how to swim in order to avoid having to take swimming lessons.

4. I know from experience that a single spark(ler) can start a forest fire.

5. At least one Sasquatch lived in the forest near my house when I was a kid--at least until their habitat caught fire one summer, the cause of which is still unknown to authorities.

6. I taught sociology at a university even though I dont have any degrees in the subject.

7. Ive never inhaled.

8. My grandmother was a grifter.

9. Ive known my best friend since the second grade.

10. The first thing he ever said to me was Hey you fat cow.

11. I was a little heavy set in the second grade.

12. Years later, I shot him with a pellet gun.

13. I almost met Joe Strummer once.

14. Ive never had a mullet, despite growing up in Florida.

15. I self-medicate with Crossfit.

16. I was tricked into becoming born again by a puppet show.

17. In college I had a discussion about the existence of God with a devout Christian and son of a minister. Years later, I found out that as a result of that discussion, he abandoned his faith.

18. I feel guilty about that (even though I didnt manipulate him with cute, furry, Muppets or anything) because he was much a much happier person being wrong. Sorry Don.

19. Ive diagnosed myself with OCD and Aspergers Syndrome.

20. In high school when I received phone calls from military recruiters I would try and talk them into quitting the military.

21. I hate all condiments.

22. I once signed an autograph for someone who thought I was Christian Slater.

23. My socks almost never match. Going beyond making sure you two white socks, or two black socks is a waste of time.

24. I own two fake moustaches.

25. I was in a band that once opened for No Doubt.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
_margot_:
Your list is infinitely better than mine.
Feb 3, 2009
homme:
Well, yeah, because you have to have an extra fake mustache. You never know.
Feb 3, 2009

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