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smith

Member Since 2003

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Friday Sep 03, 2004

Sep 2, 2004
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Sitting at Jack in the Box last evening, I noticed two things:

1.) the girl in the car in front of me was extremely fidgety. Her car was adorned with two bumper stickers: "Lick Bush in 2004" and... well, some other anti-Bush shite I can't recollect at this time. She ordered the largest size combo on the menu; I could tell this from the drink that the attendant passed her, which was excessively large. Her ponytail was tied up too far on her head, and it bounced around like some kind of demonic slinky whenever she twitched. Noting the bumper stickers, I drew the following conclusions about this girl:

a.) She had a miniscule amount of political inclination and could probably not hold a decent discourse over exactly why the aforementioned stickers were affixed to her car,
b.) Her midnight snack was a treat to herself after a hard day of doing... well, nothing. Spunky individuals don't twitch in the drive through.

That was observation one. Observation two...

2.) ...involved two twat-for-brains behind me who felt the need to blare peturbing, ghetto music. Observing them from my rearview mirror, I noticed their car was slowly motivating itself in a side-to-side swaying motion, which was undoubtedly due to one of Newton's laws of motion (which one, I cannot recollect). These two hatchet wounds were akin to human megaphones, as I could hear them squealing in delight as the next song steeped in faggotry blared through their open windows. Noting the actions and incessant noise emanating from their vehicle, I drew the following conclusions:

a.) that individuals such as this do not fall into the paradigm of my existence, as I consider them hapless lumps of carbon and trace elements, and
b.) the urge to withdraw my .45 from its holster beneath my seat and fire seven Hydra-Shok rounds at point blank range into said hapless lumps of carbon and trace elements was close to overwhelming, if not downright disturbing.

From both observations, I have drawn the following conclusions:

a.) Being trapped in a Jack in the Box drive-in waiting for a medium #4 and a cheeseburger at 12:25AM CST flanked by such peons is not conducive to mental health,
b.) Possessing a loaded firearm in the car leads to extraordinary temptation to vent simple frustrations on clueless beings,
c.) My air conditioning system generates an inordinate amount of noise for something that's non-functional.

That is all.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
synapse:
Houston's fine air lacks enough oxygen as it is, without these inbred wastes stealing more than their fair share. And also, be sure to take the time to enjoy your homicide.... perhaps it could be drawn out a little more - consider a lengthy bludgeoning first... that's always a good time.
Sep 3, 2004
feronia:
that fish felt no harm
Sep 5, 2004

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