ADVENTURES IN A POST-NUCLEAR AMERICA - A Short Synopsis of Last Night's Dream
Van Cleve, Todd the Lawn Gnome, Eric, and Shanelle and I materialized in a large underground fortress after a massive retaliatory nuclear strike against the United States. Said fortress was reminiscent of NORAD, but in actuality was more like the Vault from Fallout. Wandering about, the four of us ran across a large, dilapidated room filled with...
you guessed it. Star Wars props.
I'm talking EVERYTHING, from Han Solo's blaster to miniature Millenium Falcon models to the bad ass large anti-tank looking rifle the Stormtroopers carry on the battle of Hoth. Of course, Todd the Lawn Gnome started shooting photographs, whereupon I screamed at him to stop, as the blinding light from the flash would obviously flash off layer after layer of component molecules from the props, thus turning them to dust after x amount of snapshots. Todd the Lawn Gnome, ignoring me, keeps flashing photographs, whereupon I pick up the large Stormtrooper rifle and begin threatening him with it.
It is at this juncture in the dream that Van Cleve and Eric discover the drunken black female midget WNBA basketball coach with Budweiser cans strewn about her. This was a most disturbing discovery in such a gargantuan fortress, so someone decides to start poking her with a Tuskin Raider gafi stick that was lying about. She gets up, burps, pulls another 16 ounce can of Budweiser out of thin air, downs it, and falls on the cold steel floor, can following close behind.
End of dream.
Van Cleve, Todd the Lawn Gnome, Eric, and Shanelle and I materialized in a large underground fortress after a massive retaliatory nuclear strike against the United States. Said fortress was reminiscent of NORAD, but in actuality was more like the Vault from Fallout. Wandering about, the four of us ran across a large, dilapidated room filled with...
you guessed it. Star Wars props.
I'm talking EVERYTHING, from Han Solo's blaster to miniature Millenium Falcon models to the bad ass large anti-tank looking rifle the Stormtroopers carry on the battle of Hoth. Of course, Todd the Lawn Gnome started shooting photographs, whereupon I screamed at him to stop, as the blinding light from the flash would obviously flash off layer after layer of component molecules from the props, thus turning them to dust after x amount of snapshots. Todd the Lawn Gnome, ignoring me, keeps flashing photographs, whereupon I pick up the large Stormtrooper rifle and begin threatening him with it.
It is at this juncture in the dream that Van Cleve and Eric discover the drunken black female midget WNBA basketball coach with Budweiser cans strewn about her. This was a most disturbing discovery in such a gargantuan fortress, so someone decides to start poking her with a Tuskin Raider gafi stick that was lying about. She gets up, burps, pulls another 16 ounce can of Budweiser out of thin air, downs it, and falls on the cold steel floor, can following close behind.
End of dream.
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
lawn gnomes scare me.
:p