I've had a big problem with knowing how to feel as of late. I wouldn't say a lot of stuff's happened, but I'm just not used to being so...connected with other people.

I had coffee with an ex a few days ago and it went really well. She's got a boyfriend back home (the whole reason it didn't work out, she moved) and I'm not going to fall head over heels because to be honest all I can do is shrug my shoulders because it's nobodies fault.

I've done enough chasing, it rarely gets me anywhere...I don't know if people want to be chased really, or they just think they do because it keeps things spicy and complicated. Something to think about. Too much to think about.

I'm just trying to be laid back, I can't be bothered trying to impress people anymore. Its' not like I'm not making the effort, I'm just trying to be happy.

I think what I'm trying to say is I need someone to remind me how good things are...I'm OK on my own but I'd rather not be.

Truth be told I'm fairly happy for the moment, this is generally how things are...I would say this is normal for me at the moment.

In other news, I'm not a total misery guts.

I'm getting productive...you know...actually doing stuff. I'm filming on Wednesday and Thursday, I don't know if I'll be behind the camera or in front of it but it should be awesome either way.



Hopefully I have a band practice soon with a friend of mine from college. He's got some stuff he's been working on and so have I. I think for the time being I'll just write what I can and then get it recorded properly if I have the money.

"When I have money", I catch myself saying that far too often.

I'll finish by saying;

1) I'm thinking about video blog...it'd give me something to edit together...hmmmmmm.
2) I need to get my college documentary online...my poor first attempt at film making, haha. I'll learn, I always do.
3) Females are the bane of my existence at times but I don't know what I would do without you.
4) Other people are bane of my existence at times but I don't know what I would do without you.

I don't sleep much these days either, I've been awake until like 5am the past few nights. I can't say I'm all that bothered.

I have also shown myself to be more than adept at articulating how I feel. Maybe I should hold back with the brutal honesty.