sliverz

Ok. So fuck it all. I'm sick of this shit; all of it... moving from shithole to shithole, struggling to work something out with a bitch that doesn't want to be with me. By "work something out", I don't mean work out a romantic relationship; I mean work out a situation where I can see my kids, and not have to defend myself, or try to keep my calm while I'm harassed or treated like shit. I don't have the money for courts and lawyers, and wouldn't want to put the kids into a custody battle, anyways. I won't take the kids away from their mother. It's not right.

So, I guess I'll go to college for a couple of years; start working as a network administrator or something. I'm most likely moving to Portland, shortly after getting on my feet in Salem. I'll probably go to PCC, and get my shit together. I'm sick of holding myself back from college because I'm saving up money to move my kids and their mother into the place I've gotten at the time, just to have her tell me she's suddenly not going to do so, because her crackhead boyfriend is more important than her children being around their father. I finally gave up, and moved up here to be with them... to find that their mother was a liar, and that there aren't any jobs around here. I seriously can't get a fucking job, and I've put in an application into every place that will take one.

College it is. Then a good job. Then, if she hasn't cleared her head enough yet, I'll just score a 50/50 support order, and have my kids half of the time. *sigh* I hate fighting, and I hate being fucked around all the time. I'm sick of being angry and used.