skygge

i have had a revelation, an epiphany if you will: the mediocrity that is my life is entirely unacceptable. i care too much how people perceive me to the point of being so dull and disinteresting that my few friends don't even bother to ask me what's up, because it is perpetually "same shit, different day". screw what people think, especially the ones who think it's more than okay to keep me locked in this constant state of boredom. some people don't realize they aren't too old to change their life until they're in their 40's and going through the mid-life crisis, i'm not waiting that long. i know there will be conflicts of interest and confrontation along the way, but it's not like my life had been smooth sailing until now. tomarrow i get my butt motivated and do something to dig myself out of the hole i've fallen into... i guess that means getting out of bed before noon

i'm going shopping with my mom wednesday night. nothing out of the ordinary but at least i'll get out of the house more often than i have been. even though she can be a nutcase and doesn't understand me, it's better than going alone