well, i've been rather political in previous blogs. while my opinions haven't changed, i do believe it's time for some fun stuff. this is for a childhood hero... Chuck fuckin Norris.
When Chuck Norris was born only one person cried, the doctor. You NEVER slap Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris has counted to infinity......... Twice.
Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
Chuck Norris' tears can cure cancer, unfortunately, Chuck Norris has never cried.
If Chuck Norris sleeps with a man, it isn't because Chuck Norris is gay, it is only because Chuck Norris has run out of women.
Every night, before the Boogie Man goes to bed, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris CAN believe its not butter
Since the year Chuck Norris was born, the incidence of roundhouse kick-related deaths has increased by 40000%
If you can see Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
Chuck Norris isn't hung like a horse, horses are hung like Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his father.
Chuck Norris doesn't sleep..... he waits.
Every year at tax time Chuck Norris sends in a picture of himself crouched... ready to attack. Chuck Norris has never paid taxes.... EVER.
Chuck Norris doesnt need to shoot deer, the deer fall down mercifully at his feet.
Chuck Norris doesnt need to vote, the president will always ask him before making any decisions.
Chuck Norris never walks. Instead the universe is moving towards the oposite direction he wants to go, while he moves his feet.
If Chuck Norris ever goes blind, it won't be him. The sun will have went out.
Chuck Norris never blinks cause he might cause a tornado.
Adam was not the first man. Chuck Norris was.
Albert Einstein was wrong. There is one thing faster than light... Chuck Norris.
Lucky Luke is faster than his shadow. Chuck Norris is faster than Chuck Norris' shadow... thats better.
They once tried to crucify Chuck Norris, but unable to get the nails through his hands, they did jesus instead.
Chuck Norris can perform a round house kick so fast he can kick himself in the face.
Unable to find a suitable opponent, Chuck Norris traveled back in time and fought himself. After a seven day battle Chuck Norris is still undefeated.
Chuck Norris is reading you mind right now and he knows you're thinking about him.
When Chuck Norris was born only one person cried, the doctor. You NEVER slap Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris has counted to infinity......... Twice.
Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
Chuck Norris' tears can cure cancer, unfortunately, Chuck Norris has never cried.
If Chuck Norris sleeps with a man, it isn't because Chuck Norris is gay, it is only because Chuck Norris has run out of women.
Every night, before the Boogie Man goes to bed, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris CAN believe its not butter
Since the year Chuck Norris was born, the incidence of roundhouse kick-related deaths has increased by 40000%
If you can see Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
Chuck Norris isn't hung like a horse, horses are hung like Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his father.
Chuck Norris doesn't sleep..... he waits.
Every year at tax time Chuck Norris sends in a picture of himself crouched... ready to attack. Chuck Norris has never paid taxes.... EVER.
Chuck Norris doesnt need to shoot deer, the deer fall down mercifully at his feet.
Chuck Norris doesnt need to vote, the president will always ask him before making any decisions.
Chuck Norris never walks. Instead the universe is moving towards the oposite direction he wants to go, while he moves his feet.
If Chuck Norris ever goes blind, it won't be him. The sun will have went out.
Chuck Norris never blinks cause he might cause a tornado.
Adam was not the first man. Chuck Norris was.
Albert Einstein was wrong. There is one thing faster than light... Chuck Norris.
Lucky Luke is faster than his shadow. Chuck Norris is faster than Chuck Norris' shadow... thats better.
They once tried to crucify Chuck Norris, but unable to get the nails through his hands, they did jesus instead.
Chuck Norris can perform a round house kick so fast he can kick himself in the face.
Unable to find a suitable opponent, Chuck Norris traveled back in time and fought himself. After a seven day battle Chuck Norris is still undefeated.
Chuck Norris is reading you mind right now and he knows you're thinking about him.