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skep

Member Since 2008

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Wednesday Nov 05, 2008

Nov 5, 2008
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Right. I'm gonna get this down in writing so I'm bound to it.

About a week or so ago I posted a blog about the fact that I was feeling annoyed with myself at the poor way I've been using my time. On Monday my wife went out of town for a few days with work (back tomorrow) and I said to myself that I'm gonna get a lot of stuff done. Sort the mess in the house out, do some studying etc. What actually happened, somewhat unsurprisingly, was that I spent the whole of monday and tuesday evening on SG, or browsing the net, or... whatever. Nothing useful, anyway!

Tonight I've just finished work and it's been a horrible day. I've been spending so much time on this computer and not getting enough sleep and eating shit that I've been feeling crap all day. For work, I teach people to drive, and I've spent a lot of my day fighting fatigue and drowsiness. It's fucking scary sometimes! For the past two years, I'd say I've had on average about five to ten near crashes every day. It's only the fact that I stay alert at critical times that keeps me (and other members of the public) safe. I have to grab the steering wheel or step on the brakes several times a day. And the job is so mentally tiring due to a lot of frustration.

I'm not complaining about the job, because I know it's MY fault. I'm good at my job, but when I'm at home, I waste masses of my free time, and then I don't get enough sleep, or the right food, and so I feel like shit.

If I didn't do this now, I know I'd probably end up on SG all night, but once it's in writing, I've committed myself, so here it is. Tonight I will:
Clean my house
Get some food shopping done
Eat
Study
NOT go on SG any more.... and not tomorrow morning either
Do some songwriting

On monday nights, I run a music night at a local bar. It's an open mic thing where anybody can get up and sing and play their instruments. This last Monday night was really quiet, so I spent most of the night playing myself. For some reason, I felt inspired! I played the way I used to play, sang the way I used to sing. It made me realise that I'm wasting my talents by not doing anything with them, which is why I'm a little bit more pissed at myself for wasting yesterday.

To steal a phrase from Barack Obama: it's time for change.

Bye now, I'll be back tromorrow
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
madviking:
It is amazing how much time you can just piss away not doing what you could be getting done. The internet is close to drug use for this. whatever
Nov 5, 2008
cherrylix:
At least you got a plan! Hope you managed to stick to it.
Nov 6, 2008

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