Wednesday Sep 28, 2005

0
i have been absent for some time journal wise... have been mostly just looking at photosets when i get on here lately... bought the DVD and it is gorgeous... between working in 3-day-chunks and trying to make my 4 days off count, i feel like i've been more stressed out than i need to be...

i'm still dating a girl i have been for a couple of months and last night felt like the first sign that the shine is wearing off and difficulties are arising... maybe this is the wrong time in my life for monogamous relationships... i feel like i'm spreading myself pretty thin some days... some days i want commitment and comfort and other days i'm perfectly happy just having a little fun and not questioning it or trying to make more out of it... most of all i think i feel scattered... nothing seems to be consistant from day to day... i need to write a goddamn book... tongue... maybe that would help me sort through my cluttered brain and take stock of my situation...

ah, and my new laptop should be arriving via UPS today... yay!!! my new toy... every computer i've used up until now has been a hand-me-down... i'm excited...
sorrowsjoy:
Hmmm the things about relationships is when the honeymoon is over you have to balance the seriousness and fun--Can you juggle?--But it is worth it because if it was always shining you would be blinded by it sometime--Like staring into the sun---And the biggest thing is honesty--Blatant if it helps your inner conflicts--And believe me routine is nice for stability but order without chaos would be just boring--They cannot exist without eachother--So maybe a new approach?--We as humans tend to just end it because we do not want to be hurt--Understandable but it comes with the territory--Anyways sorry for the long post lol and ty for the add--Take care sweetie and good luck smile

Lexi

P.S.--Aren't new toys fun? wink

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