sissy

i am feeling good... better than i have in a long time... i feel more complete than i have for over a year... since the ex left... yes, i've been bummed thinking of her... i don't know what will happen... for once i'm kind of comfortable with that... more comfortable in my own skin than i ever have been... i'm open to love, whether it comes from familiar places or new ones... i'm best at feeling out situations as they arise... my issue is knowing when or whether to make them arise... in other words, i suck at flirting in real life situations... and i really don't know whether that's what i need or want...

i don't know if i'm struggling with my own urges or just struggling with this societally induced image of what i should be... namely, coupled... or looking to be... i'm pretty comfortable right now... happy... doing what i need to be doing for myself...