since Man fell into consciousness and self-consciousness, that we can only go forward step by step through realization, full, bitter conscious realization. This is true of all the great terrors and agonies and anguishes of life: sex and ware and even crime. . . The small pox sores are running yet in the spirit of mankind. And we have got to take this putrid spirit to our bosom. There's nothing else for it. Take the foul rotten spirit of mankind, full of the running sores of the war to our bosom and cleanse it there. Cleanse it not with blind love: ah, no, that won't help. But with bitter and wincing realization. We have to take the disease into our consciousness and let it go through our soul, like some virus. We have got to realize. And then we can surpass.
D.H. Lawrence
For them too history was a tale like any other too often heard, their land a pawnshop
James Joyce
I realize now the import of my study of the modernist authors. It has all been said, we reiterate, plagerize, lift. The old parts disassembled and re-organized in such a way that it seems new but the function is the same. The cancer has spread to the lungs and this sickness will kill us, we "convaless" but this illness is terminal. Art is culture being aware of itself. An alshiemer's patient will have occasioal moments of near divine clarity when thet realize the scope of their own disease realize that they are already dead trapped in a sterile white room, pretending to still be of a world that has finished with them.
I live on because I love being alive and if this life is death imagine what it would be to be really alive, a healthy, young human culture. I cross myself and thank whatever celetial body I can see, (even the clouds) that the universe is cyclical. I wish I were sitting on a beach somewhere.
"I steal from every movie ever made." quentin tarantino
and i'm glad you worked out the crisis. not sure what happened though. paperwork issues?
xo