In the past few weeks, we've been taking advantage of having a car and taking day trips around the area. So we've checked out Crown Point, Indiana (snore), Kenosha, Wisconsin (sad but neat), Geneva, Illinois (fun and cute) and a few other spots. On Sunday, we decided to head to Schaumburg, and pick up some stuff at the enormous Woodfield Mall.

I thought for sure, after years of dragging my ass from store to store on State Street or Michigan Avenue and hauling bags on the bus, I would sing the praises of the mall. But, I've relearned something: malls fucking blow.

First, the outer suburbs as a whole kind of suck. After visiting a few inner ring suburbs, I was revising my attitudes. A lot of older suburbs have nice downtowns, streets with sidewalks, and are just built on a livable scale. I've been suitably impressed with places like Oak Park that I would consider living out there.

Then: there was Schamburg.

Holy shit. I never had any sense of where I was, all the buildings looked the same, and every street was really an entrance to a parking lot. It was maddeningly disorienting.

The mall itself ... was a mall. Crowded. Loud. Filled with kids and old ladies.

I understand why malls are popular, especially in the Midwest where the weather is actively working to kill you. That said, this place was still desolate and creepy. I'll gladly talk lugging bags around in the heat and ice over THAT.