I have to own my dissertation. I mean, it's not even a dissertation yet, just a proposal - and already I have to take ownership.
I always heard that your diss. was "your responsibility." And I thought I understood that. I figured, "Hey, I work hard and I'm responsible - I can stay on task." But, no, that's not really what they meant (or apparently it's not). Owning my dissertation means that it's MY job to see it along every step of the way, and prod people along.
I don't like to write whiny journal entries. Life is too kind to me to do that; it's just unbecoming. But damn.
I turned in some pages to my advisor E. on December 20th, which he said he would read over break. I emailed him the first week of the quarter. He had entirely forgotten about reading them, and said he would get on them. I didn't hear from him, so I emailed him the *next* week. And I never heard from him.
Because he was in the *Bahamas.* Now, I'm not his momma. He doesn't have to tell me where he's going, or when he's going to be back. But I do firmly believe that we have a professional relationship, and part of that is owning up to when he's going to fulfill his half of the bargain. Advising students is part of the "gig" so far as I'm concerned, and *he's* the one pursuing grad students.
So, what does me owning my dissertation mean? E. wanted to hold off on asking people to be readers, and showing them more work. Over the weekend, I emailed out pages to three different faculty that I'm fielding for readers. I also made some appointments with people who are working in a similar vein as my project. Finally, I've decided that I'm going to have to have a chat with E. about feedback turnover.
I realize this makes me like the world's bitchiest grad student. I know faculty are busy, and I'm supposed to be appropriately in awe of their brilliance. But more and more, it's feeling like grad school is the goddamn prison block: they're all just waiting to see if I'm wiling to let myself get fucked. I'm almost 27 years old; I have spent *9* years in higher education - five of those in graduate shool (that's two Master's degrees and now working on the Ph.d). I'm not about to hang out and get fucked anymore. They'll keep me here another ten I figure if I let me. But I want a house and babies, so piss on them.
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My Overall Track Chart
I always heard that your diss. was "your responsibility." And I thought I understood that. I figured, "Hey, I work hard and I'm responsible - I can stay on task." But, no, that's not really what they meant (or apparently it's not). Owning my dissertation means that it's MY job to see it along every step of the way, and prod people along.
I don't like to write whiny journal entries. Life is too kind to me to do that; it's just unbecoming. But damn.
I turned in some pages to my advisor E. on December 20th, which he said he would read over break. I emailed him the first week of the quarter. He had entirely forgotten about reading them, and said he would get on them. I didn't hear from him, so I emailed him the *next* week. And I never heard from him.
Because he was in the *Bahamas.* Now, I'm not his momma. He doesn't have to tell me where he's going, or when he's going to be back. But I do firmly believe that we have a professional relationship, and part of that is owning up to when he's going to fulfill his half of the bargain. Advising students is part of the "gig" so far as I'm concerned, and *he's* the one pursuing grad students.
So, what does me owning my dissertation mean? E. wanted to hold off on asking people to be readers, and showing them more work. Over the weekend, I emailed out pages to three different faculty that I'm fielding for readers. I also made some appointments with people who are working in a similar vein as my project. Finally, I've decided that I'm going to have to have a chat with E. about feedback turnover.
I realize this makes me like the world's bitchiest grad student. I know faculty are busy, and I'm supposed to be appropriately in awe of their brilliance. But more and more, it's feeling like grad school is the goddamn prison block: they're all just waiting to see if I'm wiling to let myself get fucked. I'm almost 27 years old; I have spent *9* years in higher education - five of those in graduate shool (that's two Master's degrees and now working on the Ph.d). I'm not about to hang out and get fucked anymore. They'll keep me here another ten I figure if I let me. But I want a house and babies, so piss on them.
********************************************************************************************************************
My Weekly Artist Chart
My Weekly Track Chart
My Overall Artist Chart
My Overall Track Chart
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