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shynola

Manchester

Member Since 2005

Followers 39 Following 19

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Monday Apr 24, 2006

Apr 24, 2006
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Hello

I'm full of a cold.

I was also a single slapper of biblical proportions - Shy and alcohol shouldn't be mixed. I'm taking a well earned break from it.

Since breaking up with the non-oral bed buddy that was my ex-boyfriend I have successfully managed to obtain a phone full of new numbers and potential suitors, all of them I have convieniently misplaced, mainly because I have a wonderful ability to delete text messages and/or phone numbers as swiftly as I got them. I am a fantastic bitch at the moment. I'm sorry. No seriously - I do delete my messages and call log every week or so - they just aren't important and I am considering chucking my phone in the Manchester Ship Canal along with my TV.

I'm not doing very well at earning those karma points I so desparately need to keep a happy equilbrium.

I think I can explain - I am taking out my own personal disapointments and relationship misfortunes on others and this neither fair or a healthy attitude to take.

I consulted my i-ching and basically they told me to calm down and get to know myself and regain some of that all important self respect again. Another thing I convienently lost on a drunken night or two out in the northwest. Again - fun, but naughty. I am returning to my straightedge days where hopefully the old bright eyed and bushy tailed me will return.

I hope you understand the serverity of this situation means I am bailing on a date with a very beautiful irish dreadlocked builder from Rochdale? He actually lives just round the corner from me, BUT is the best friend of my most signficant ex who, has had 3 chances to get with me over the years and although I have a lot of love for him as a freind, I don't think getting it on with his closest buddy would be a good idea for our public relations in our close nit circle of friends. Even if I do think - fuck it. Three chances are more then enough and you can't help who you are attracted to. He is god damn beautiful but being just that doesn't really make a man.

To be honest I really thought I would be slipping back into my role of secret squirrel - the lover in hiding through fear of being caught out by either an ex, current or future partner of theirs pretending not to care and trying swiftly to get over the hurt. But this seems different, they boy called me instead of text and has so far asked me out for a drink with his buddies on two occasions. I don't know if my barriers and pre-conceptions of how I would get treated are getting in the way of actually getting together with someone I find both sexually and phsyically attractive. His adventure skills could be inproved. The stoner, dread locked, traveller type projects a physical presence being of worldly wise and well wondered, inactual fact has never owned a passport. How looks can be deceiving eh?

Anyway - I've bailed in favour of friendship, who knows something may come of it once we get to know eachother.

hmmmm - all complicated.

My lemsip calls

Shy xxx
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
silveronthetree:
Hello mate, wondered how you are.

smile
Jun 23, 2006
captmonte:
Hey, when the hell are you getting back here to write? Hunh?! Jeez, and I thought I was bad. Heh. Talk to you later English!
Jul 12, 2006

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