WELL!
Why is it the moment I make something public it all goes down hill?
I purposely wasn't telling you about new man thing as I was not really sure where things were at - we work together and I was expecting it to fail at the first hurdle. He's really busy most of the time, stupidly well respected, a fantastic tutor, designer of biblical proportions and seemed to be extremely thoughtful, giving me treats and coming accross as serious about me too - he even said, and I quote 'I could easily fall in love with you' to which my heart nearly stopped!
We had a conversation last night based generally about sex and stuff when it transpired that he's not over his relationship with his ex - WHY DO I GET THIS ALL THE TIME!?! Apparently what happened was he was totally in love, and she had full control. What ever she asked him to do he would do, even hurt other people in the process. It sounds like he was blindly in love, ignoring his friends advice and sticking by her. He even moved up here from down south to get away from her! Must have been bad, but why put these negative feelings onto me because of her? He's slightly sexually inhibited, actually refusing to go down on me because of his ex and what she did to him. This is a crazy situation - I can't constantly be the understanding girlfriend, massaging his ego (ahem
) while I long to be sort of fully accepted as I have done with him.
What can I do? I don't really want to walk away, but man I feel negative about myself now and unsure about his feelings towards me. Second best to an ex again! How can I compete with her? It's all that rose tinted glasses thing. He said that he didn't want to see her again, but he could not say if he would or wouldn't go back to her if she asked him. Maybe I should cut my loses and walk away before I get hurt, which is envitable really. Try and be happy in the thought that it's not me! Time to back off me thinks - I know there is nothing much I can do but advice would be good!
I could always go tease the Mad Scientist? No No No! Never go back!
Anyway! Hope you are all well. Crufts is on and I am still after a big guard dog to ride with me to work and keep me safe. The flat is looking good and I found a way to work that avoids the rush of traffic - busy main roads are pap on a bike! Just need to get the confidence and weather to get em out! Gotta get fit, if the monkey man isn't making me feel happy then I'll sure as hell try myself to up my mood! Negativity is not big or clever! Wonder how many calories laying laminate flooring uses! I'm a woman obsessed!
Right kids - nearly time for best in show!! hahaha
Take it squeezy!
Shy xxxx
Why is it the moment I make something public it all goes down hill?
I purposely wasn't telling you about new man thing as I was not really sure where things were at - we work together and I was expecting it to fail at the first hurdle. He's really busy most of the time, stupidly well respected, a fantastic tutor, designer of biblical proportions and seemed to be extremely thoughtful, giving me treats and coming accross as serious about me too - he even said, and I quote 'I could easily fall in love with you' to which my heart nearly stopped!
We had a conversation last night based generally about sex and stuff when it transpired that he's not over his relationship with his ex - WHY DO I GET THIS ALL THE TIME!?! Apparently what happened was he was totally in love, and she had full control. What ever she asked him to do he would do, even hurt other people in the process. It sounds like he was blindly in love, ignoring his friends advice and sticking by her. He even moved up here from down south to get away from her! Must have been bad, but why put these negative feelings onto me because of her? He's slightly sexually inhibited, actually refusing to go down on me because of his ex and what she did to him. This is a crazy situation - I can't constantly be the understanding girlfriend, massaging his ego (ahem
) while I long to be sort of fully accepted as I have done with him.
What can I do? I don't really want to walk away, but man I feel negative about myself now and unsure about his feelings towards me. Second best to an ex again! How can I compete with her? It's all that rose tinted glasses thing. He said that he didn't want to see her again, but he could not say if he would or wouldn't go back to her if she asked him. Maybe I should cut my loses and walk away before I get hurt, which is envitable really. Try and be happy in the thought that it's not me! Time to back off me thinks - I know there is nothing much I can do but advice would be good!
I could always go tease the Mad Scientist? No No No! Never go back!
Anyway! Hope you are all well. Crufts is on and I am still after a big guard dog to ride with me to work and keep me safe. The flat is looking good and I found a way to work that avoids the rush of traffic - busy main roads are pap on a bike! Just need to get the confidence and weather to get em out! Gotta get fit, if the monkey man isn't making me feel happy then I'll sure as hell try myself to up my mood! Negativity is not big or clever! Wonder how many calories laying laminate flooring uses! I'm a woman obsessed!
Right kids - nearly time for best in show!! hahaha
Take it squeezy!
Shy xxxx
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how are you?
laying laminate flooring hey, cool