shirokuma

Alright I know that I do not wright on this thing at regular intervals or as much as I should. For me just writing on it at all is a lot. I have been playing video games a good bit lately, ok ok all the time. I realized something about that fact, it is a measure of how depressed I am and have been for a while. Having to quit school I think was what cut it for me, cut out all hope that is. After I had no choice but to quit school I lost my happiness and now all I want to do is immerse myself into a world where I don't have to think about my life. I used to like working out and going outside and doing things such as hiking and playing disc golf, but every time I think about doing any of things it seems like I just don't care. This is also a bad thing because I have gained a lot of weight and can't get the motivation to lose it. I wish there was some way to put some hope back into my life to where I would want to do those things again. I am also noticing less of a desire for sex while I am in this state of emotion, which I think is worse but that's just a matter of opinion.