shinobiryu

Today is the First Day of the Rest of your Afterlife
A wwwwelcome to all our members, including those who may have picked up copies of my little book which I have, wwwwith great success, been leaving on tempting balconies, rooftops, in disused crypts and other places wwwhere prospective members might, ahaha, hang out!!
And to those reading this for the first time, congratulations!!! You may be lying in your coffin, perhaps, listening to ttthhe mob pounding at the door, you may be hiding in tithe old wwwwindmill, wwwondering how long it wwwill be before the flames find you, you may even be listening to the crowd mixing up the garlic enema and sharpening the stake, but we have good news:
YOU HAVE FRIENDS !!!!!!
You may think: but I am a vampire! But The League of Temperance know wwwhere you are coming from, even if at the moment you are more concerned with wwwhere you are going to. And wwwwe tell you;
You Can Stop Any Time!
But you have to wwant to stop!!!
Oh, no doubt you have heard that a Reformed Vampyre is neurotic, paranoid, obsessive and liable to crazy frantic mood swwwings. And it is true that there are side-effects to our 'Three Steps, One Hop and One Long Jump' programme. BUT! And this is the Important Point! The Reformed Vampyre is not the one with an apple in their mouth and a clove of garlic where the sun does not shine who is wwwaiting for the stroke of the sharpened axe! No indeed!
So now raise you your head, using your hands if necessary, and say; That's it! I am Not At All Mad, I have had Enough and I am not going to be Staked Any More!!!!!
And that is the first step that you have taken!