sheen

i've just been watching programme on channel 4 called fat beauty contest and i have to say, it has made me very self conscious. i have always had an issue with my weight and the way that i look, to the point of refusing to wear tank tops or skirts and generally avoiding changing rooms as i am likely to burst into tears. however, i have never considered myself to be 'plus-size' then i saw some girls trying to enter the competition who were my size, a UK 12-14 (US 8-10). The organiser did decide in the end that they were too small, but i dunno, should i consider myself 'plus-size' because i am not small enough to be the size of a real model? it's confusing sometimes, especially when i recently registered at the doctors and the nurse said i should try and lose 10-15lbs. i don't think it's right to encourage people to be overweight or to even reassure them as it is detrimental to your health if you don't exercise or eat a balanced diet. however, i am a strict vegetarian and i never eat junk food, i could probably exercise more than i do, but i walk for over 30 mins a day and do 3 miles on the exercise bike every day and i do 30 sits ups about 3 times a week. maybe it's just not possible for me to be skinny. but still i resent the fact that i at least put in the effort and skill get grouped into the category of being overweight. maybe it's just cause i am a girl, and girls are never happy with the way they look.