I read this really interesting article a few weeks back about tips for relationship longevity, and although I don't remember the site so I can link it, I thought I'd share some of the ones that stuck out to me and made me think of the mistakes in my previous relationships. In no particular order:
1. Accept that you will not always be "head-over-heels" in love with your partner, because they are human like you are, and in fact sometimes you may roll over and be annoyed that they're still here; but, if you really want the relationship to work, know that this will pass and ride out that wave.
2. No relationship is truly 50/50, since everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses. Instead of trying to always be balanced, support each other in the areas they are strong in and you're weak and vice versa.
-this one really got me, since too often you see people talking about a scorecard in their relationship, like "I took out the trash 4 times this week, you owe me this one time." Your relationship isn't a scorecard, and if all you're worried about is "points" then you're missing the reason you should be in a relationship.
3. If you lose respect for your partner, you lose respect for the relationship.
-so true. This also means stuff like not putting your partner down in public, even if they're annoying you, and not airing your dirty laundry to everyone. Sure, you can vent to a couple close friends, but ultimately the person you should be trying to fix your relationship with is your partner, not an outsider. Except for therapy and/or counseling, that doesn't count for this.
4. Make time for sex.
-yes, some relationships are romantic without being sexual, but for the majority of us, being in love and in a relationship means being sexual with each other. Sure, life can get in the way and there are times when you just can't because of some reason or another (unless it's because she's on her period, cuz period sex can help with cramping and guys if you're "grossed out" by the thought of that you need to man up LOL), but if you are constantly making excuses why neither one of you can have sex, it will take its toll on a relationship. Trust me, I know.
The other ones the article talked about were things I talk about here all the time, like trusting your partner, being able to communicate openly with them, the fact that you shouldn't do everything together because you are each your own person, and how humor really helps especially when the bad times happen (and they will happen). I'd love to know what you all thought, so don't be shy and let me know what you think. Take care of yourselves and each other :) <3
