Why am I so weak and why does one person have the ability to cause so much joy and so much misery all the same? My bulldog tenacity is my own undoing it would seem and leaves me clinging to an anchor that drowns me yet gives me life.
And after it all I just pick up the papers and see that there is so much worse shit going on everywhere and I should be happy with what I have or don't have anymore since its a lot worse for so many other people.
Like the dumb dog I am I will keep marching around looking for and defending the scraps.
Oh yeah and when the stock market is open my office is open so I have 8 hours to sit and think. I don't know which is worse - being awake and having nothing but time to think and dwell or sleeping and having the same thoughts recast as dreams/nightmares.
I have the resolve and determination to do so many things and I usually am the strong one but why in this one time is it failing me and leaving me incapable of doing what should be done? I know it and everyone around me is waiting for it, yet I can't. Not yet
And after it all I just pick up the papers and see that there is so much worse shit going on everywhere and I should be happy with what I have or don't have anymore since its a lot worse for so many other people.
Like the dumb dog I am I will keep marching around looking for and defending the scraps.
Oh yeah and when the stock market is open my office is open so I have 8 hours to sit and think. I don't know which is worse - being awake and having nothing but time to think and dwell or sleeping and having the same thoughts recast as dreams/nightmares.
I have the resolve and determination to do so many things and I usually am the strong one but why in this one time is it failing me and leaving me incapable of doing what should be done? I know it and everyone around me is waiting for it, yet I can't. Not yet