Getting out of this mind-frame that i am so un-lovable...
My life is very strange right now.
All i can think about is Kate. All i want to do is be with Kate. Sleep next to her. Fuck her. Get fucked by her. Be there, for as long as it could possibly work out. Kate. Kate. Kate. It's very frustrating.
And she's in it, but she doesn't want to work. I am too far away. I get it distance doesn't work. But i would make it work.
Anyways. There is this friend of mine. Reeza. I thought we were just friends. Shes encouraging, helpful, listens, and we have good times talking. Turns out she likes me. I am in no mind frame for it. Not with the Kate on my mind. It would be wrong and i know it. Because Reeza is good, you know, shes the kind of girl, you settle down with and be happy. And i would not want to ruin that by pretending its what i want when i am not there..
But yet, there is this other girl Stacy. Just started talking to her. Shes fresh out of a relationship. And whats the one thing on my mind. I want to get laid. Shes close, shes cute, and shes in no condition to be in a relationship anyways.
*shakes head*
I dont get myself. Why would i throw myself at someone, who is more likely looking for a rebound, and sex? Then someone who cares.
Then i think about it. Technically im doing the same thing. I am looking for a distraction from Kate. I want to forget Kate. Because... it wont happen and i know it. And what good is loving someone who doesnt love you back.
So the question of the day..
Do i distract myself, get some mild satisfaction, get laid, and possibly get stuck in a relationship that will go nowhere.
Or continue on feeling like crap?
My life is very strange right now.
All i can think about is Kate. All i want to do is be with Kate. Sleep next to her. Fuck her. Get fucked by her. Be there, for as long as it could possibly work out. Kate. Kate. Kate. It's very frustrating.
And she's in it, but she doesn't want to work. I am too far away. I get it distance doesn't work. But i would make it work.
Anyways. There is this friend of mine. Reeza. I thought we were just friends. Shes encouraging, helpful, listens, and we have good times talking. Turns out she likes me. I am in no mind frame for it. Not with the Kate on my mind. It would be wrong and i know it. Because Reeza is good, you know, shes the kind of girl, you settle down with and be happy. And i would not want to ruin that by pretending its what i want when i am not there..
But yet, there is this other girl Stacy. Just started talking to her. Shes fresh out of a relationship. And whats the one thing on my mind. I want to get laid. Shes close, shes cute, and shes in no condition to be in a relationship anyways.
*shakes head*
I dont get myself. Why would i throw myself at someone, who is more likely looking for a rebound, and sex? Then someone who cares.
Then i think about it. Technically im doing the same thing. I am looking for a distraction from Kate. I want to forget Kate. Because... it wont happen and i know it. And what good is loving someone who doesnt love you back.
So the question of the day..
Do i distract myself, get some mild satisfaction, get laid, and possibly get stuck in a relationship that will go nowhere.
Or continue on feeling like crap?
Wishing you the best.
kd
you put one foot in front of another
try and do things that interest you
that interest you alone
and don't look now, but see what happens
the world is your oyster, pearl girl