Well yesterday was awkward but flatterin
Well I went to Sarah's yesterday. She was very flirty with me, like trying to tickle me and tracing her finger on my leg and stuff. She couldn't have spelled KISS ME any clearer. The thing is she has a boyfriend so I just played it off and when it got a little close I told her I had to leave. She gave me a goodbye hug and pulled her head back and stared into my eyes. I kissed her cheek and said my goodbyes. I'm not into making anyone a cheater.
Then Natalie called me late last night and was begging me to come over. I didn't want to and kept saying no. Well then she told me that she really needs a friend to talk to because she went out with some guy the night before and something bad happend. So I was concerned and told her ok. Well I got there and she was pretty drunk, but not the least bit upset. She wanted to watch a movie so I did and then she came at me with full force. I virtually had to push her off of me told her it wasn't going to happen, grabbed my shit and left. I was talking to Kim at work and told her what happened. I guess she met some dude off myspace and slept with him the same night puke
I lost what little respect I had for her and I'm going to avoid her like syphilis
Well I went to Sarah's yesterday. She was very flirty with me, like trying to tickle me and tracing her finger on my leg and stuff. She couldn't have spelled KISS ME any clearer. The thing is she has a boyfriend so I just played it off and when it got a little close I told her I had to leave. She gave me a goodbye hug and pulled her head back and stared into my eyes. I kissed her cheek and said my goodbyes. I'm not into making anyone a cheater.
Then Natalie called me late last night and was begging me to come over. I didn't want to and kept saying no. Well then she told me that she really needs a friend to talk to because she went out with some guy the night before and something bad happend. So I was concerned and told her ok. Well I got there and she was pretty drunk, but not the least bit upset. She wanted to watch a movie so I did and then she came at me with full force. I virtually had to push her off of me told her it wasn't going to happen, grabbed my shit and left. I was talking to Kim at work and told her what happened. I guess she met some dude off myspace and slept with him the same night puke
I lost what little respect I had for her and I'm going to avoid her like syphilis
sorry i've been away. but i'm back from the dead now and can't believe i was dumb enough to spend so much time in darkness and isolation fighting for something that in the end wasn't really anything like it claimed to be. oh well, lesson learned.
hope you've had some of the good kind of trouble to balance out the bad
gory details
anywho now i'm on an upswing and in fact cannot remember when i've been this happy because i have self worth coming from me now and not my gpa, my parent's approval, or some guy's' affection. i don't need those things to like me. i just like me. and that has probably never happened in my life. so things are grand even though i'm getting mad curveballs thrown at me by life.
that and i've weened myself off of both caffiene and aspartame, which were messing up my heart and making it palpitate and spiking my moods.
so yeah. still have ptsd bullshit. still have problems. still have crazy life situations. but i'm deal with everything in a healthy way with a much more balanced perspective.
one day at a time. fuck yeah. that's the way.
so glad to hear you're doing better