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sewpunk

Member Since 2005

Followers 41 Following 53

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Wednesday Jul 06, 2005

Jul 6, 2005
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Uggggh. I feel like a freaking unhealthy mess. I stopped caring about what I put into my body and have only been thinking about what tastes good, or what I have a craving for. NOT GOOD! I have put on a few pounds and I am having a hard time shedding them.

I was doing so good this past year, I lost 50 pounds, and since I have gained back about 10. I dont like it. And those last 10 were the hardest to loose. I got rid of all my big clothes, and now all I kept were my size 8s and they are feeling a little snug.

I have no desire to be stick thin, I love my curves, I just want to get rid of my gut and unnecessary leg chunk!!! A friend at my gym said she was going to show me some of her ab exercises, but the hell of a good will it do me, if I come back to my desk and eat a big grab of chips after a lunch.

I used to eat non-fat yogurt and cottage cheese, whole grains, fruits and veggies. A big salad every night with small, light dinner now every meal seems to be all about grease and carbs. puke

I just got done a grab bag of party mix, and now my stomach hurts and I feel like a load of shit. I need to hold onto this feeling. REMEMBER this moment. You feel like shit. The moral of the story is - Dont put garbage into your body, cause youre only going to get garbage out. You like to be healthy, so eat that way!

Anyway, it crappier news, I found out a friend from back in the day was killed in a car accident. WTF people! DONT DRIVE DRUNK! I am sick of tragedy already.
kera:
i'm a suicide-girl-to-be...a limbo girl. i have a set waiting to go up, which hopefully it will one day, and then i'll get my suicide girl wings or something. so i post in pink, but i have no set. smile
your kitty is gorgeous - she looks like my little black kitty, only less chubby. miao!!
i haven't decided about the laptop yet...my credit card debt is mounting, but i feel like i can justify it because of the whole school thing. but i will have decided within the next two hours....
when you guys get some stuff made send me pics! or better yet, links if you have a website.
Jul 6, 2005
emiloo:
Thank you, I am starting to feel a little better. I still get sad when i go upstairs and I don't hear her squeak, or when I'm making salad and I have to fight the urge to put some on the side to take up to her. But everything heals with time.

Oh, and I know what it's like to have an uncontrollable appetite. I'll eat really healthy for a week or 2, and then suddenly it's like I have to make up for all the lost junk food time and BINGE. I've actually been fighting and eating disorder since I was about 13....it's not gone but it's manageable. I've been eating crap lately...nothing has changed on the scale but I can definitely feel it in my clothes.
Jul 7, 2005

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