we were informed that tomorrow we are leaving for our home base and training is over. I suppose I can stop whining now but the night still isn't over yet. The kids do this thing where someone runs into the 'crowd' of people standing 'attention' and try and knock you down. I'm at freaking point but there is no point in freaking now cause I'm leaving. The captain of our unit is totally at fault. I'd love to throw a pie at that fat fucks face for allowing such chaos.
Chris Cornell seems to be my god lately. His music has this deep sadness tone to it that's always been comforting to me but I think that its a very bad habit to allow sadness to make me feel comfortable. I have to say that I've done a decent job at not allowing regret to take over my body. First of all, I know what I'm capable of doing. I will not deny that I've thought about putting my rifle in my mouth and pulling the trigger but those thoughts quickly disappear. I have so much to learn, I think I've been through some things the past three months with the army that will help me, but I just don't know what yet. I know I've become very close with my fellow soldiers so I guess that counts as something. I told one of the guys about my past and he was very receptive about it all.
Chris Cornell seems to be my god lately. His music has this deep sadness tone to it that's always been comforting to me but I think that its a very bad habit to allow sadness to make me feel comfortable. I have to say that I've done a decent job at not allowing regret to take over my body. First of all, I know what I'm capable of doing. I will not deny that I've thought about putting my rifle in my mouth and pulling the trigger but those thoughts quickly disappear. I have so much to learn, I think I've been through some things the past three months with the army that will help me, but I just don't know what yet. I know I've become very close with my fellow soldiers so I guess that counts as something. I told one of the guys about my past and he was very receptive about it all.